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It’s a question that has tormented men for generations. As we wait outside the bathroom dying for a pee or needing to shower, shave, or brush our teeth; as we sit alone in restaurants busying ourselves with our mobile phones, worried that people will think our dates have simply given up on us and gone home; as we stand around shopping malls holding shopping bags while our wives, girlfriends, or female friends “run to the restroom for a second” and are nowhere to be seen for what seems like aeons, the question on our minds is always the same: What, in the name of sweet baby Jesus and his shepherd pals, are women doing in the bathroom that could possibly take so, so long?

Finally, we have some answers in the form of a series of 10 surprisingly frank quotes direct from the women of Japan, as gathered by popular Japanese website Naver Matome. If you’ve ever wondered why girls spend so long in the bathroom, this may prove to be enlightening reading.

This, ladies, is why the line for the ladies room is so long and why, gentlemen, you also have to wait forever despite not even being in it.

1. “I wait for the pee smell to dissipate before leaving the room.”

Girls, that’s very considerate of you, but so long as you’re not letting rip all over the floor and leaving it there, it can’t possibly smell that strongly, surely?

washikiPhoto: Matukura

2. “If it’s a Japanese-style toilet and I’m wearing a long skirt or boot-cut pants, I take care not to get them dirty.”

Granted, Japanese-style, or washiki, toilets can be tricky, especially in this day and age when even most Japanese are used to Western-style toilets, but surely a skirt is better than pants? Tackling those things wearing dress pants is no fun either…

3. “During my time of the month, I check that I haven’t accidentally dirtied the toilet.”

OK, we’ll forgive you for that one. Now let’s move swiftly on before all the guys start feeling awkward…

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4. “Most women are constipated by default, so when they get that rare urge to answer the call of nature, it can take a great deal of time and effort. Sometimes it even makes us break out in sweat.”

I was about to take issue with that initial comment, but after looking into it, it would appear that a shockingly high number of women in Japan do suffer with constipation. Try prunes, yogurt and gentle exercise, ladies.

5. “Women have larger bladders than men, so it takes longer for us to empty them.”

Um, I’m not entirely sure that’s true…

6. “I use deorodising wipes to clean the soles of my feet or my armpits.”

Your feet!? How stinky could they possibly be to require a mid-day mop?

oh! email!Image: She Knows

7. “I often find myself checking my mobile phone when I’m inside the stall – if I have mail I end up reading it.”

See, this is why sitting down on a nice, warm toilet seat is never a good idea. Didn’t they invent special lady-urinals and accessories in China to encourage women to hurry it up?

8. “I put my contact lenses in or apply fake eyelashes. Sometimes I get changed.”

So is it safe to assume you were barely able to see and wearing your pyjamas when you entered the restroom? That’s quite the transformation!

9. “Sometimes I check that there’s nothing up my nose or between my teeth. I use the time to do the kind of things I can’t do in front of others.”

See, we men always imagined ladies’ rooms were all flower petals and cotton balls. Now all we’re picturing is girls tweezing nostril hairs and picking their teeth like we do – let us keep our stupid dream alive.

And finally, there was this incredible nugget of information:


10. “Sometimes I start dozing off in front of my computer at work. I can’t get anything done, so at times like these I go for a little sleep.”

Our minds: officially blown. I wonder if she takes a little pillow with her…

Source: Naver Matome
Top image: Concord Pastor edited by RocketNews24