CE 1

For most of us, killing a cockroach is about the closest we’ll come to a real-life video game boss fight. As soon as one appears, you know there’s no point in negotiating, and the only option is to throw everything you have at it.

For one woman in Taiwan, her struggle with a roach followed video game logic to the very end, as after she killed her adversary an explosion occurred. Instead of destroying an evil overlord’s castle, though, it simply ruined her office toilet.

Cockroaches are notoriously hardy foes, so we can understand why a woman with the surname Xie decided to err on the side of overkill when she discovered a cockroach while cleaning her office’s bathroom. First, she gave it a solid whack with a slipper, doing enough damage that the insect appeared to have stopped breathing.

With resilient roaches, though it’s easy to get faked out and think you’ve finished one off when it stops moving, only for the creature to spring back to life when you go to sweep the body away. Obviously wanting to avoid this, Xie moved onto Phase Two of her offensive by wrapping the roach in a tissue.

At this point, we can think of a couple of sensible options. Squeezing the tissue to thoroughly squash the roach would be a simple, if messy, way of making sure it was dead. You could also tie the tissue up in a plastic baggy, meaning you’d have, at worst, a severely wounded, trapped insect to deal with. Or, of course, Xie could have just flushed it down the toilet, which was right in front of her.

Instead, the Taiwanese office worker went with a much more dramatic plan of attack: setting the wrapped cockroach carcass on fire.

▼ In Xie’s mind, roaches require the same tactics as trolls.

CE 3

The exact details of how Xie MacGyvered a fire in the restroom are unknown, but we can’t argue with the immediate effectiveness of her plan, since it meant she had one less cockroach to worry about. On the flip-side, it also meant she had one more flaming carapace to handle.

Now suddenly remembering that the toilet was right there, Xie plunked the burning bundle into the bowl and pressed the handle. As you’d expect, flushing the toilet made the water disappear. Somewhat more surprisingly, like a porcelain wizard trying to preserve some mystical balance of the elements, it then created fire by exploding.

CE 2

It turns out that in the course of tidying up the toilet, Xie had mixed two cleaning products, one containing acid, and the other alkali. The combination produced gas which gathered in the bowl and was then ignited by the flaming insect.

Thankfully, the blaze was quickly put out and no one was injured (except the roach, of course, which was now not only dead but immolated as well).

We can all breathe a sigh of relief knowing that cockroaches haven’t stepped up their destructive capabilities by acquiring the ability to explode after death, just like it turns out they aren’t growing horns.

Still, if you find them so disgusting that you can’t resist the urge to go all Final Fantasy black mage when killing one, let this be a lesson. Fire is a poor choice because of the potential for collateral damage, and lightning is an equally inadvisable method of attack with the toilet bowl’s water right there to conduct electricity. Really, the only logical choice is to use ice.

Sources: ET Today, 47 News
Top image: ET Today
Insert image: WordPress
[ Read in Japanese ]