Engrish

Man-Eating Sushi Terrorizes and Fornicates in “Dead Sushi” Film Trailer

In recent years, sushi has quickly become the most popular Japanese food outside of Japan.

It is against this backdrop of rapid sushi globalization that Japanese film director Noboru Iguchi, the mastermind behind such cult horror classics as RoboGeisha and Mutant Girls Squad, dares to ask the question: what if sushi grew fangs and tried to eat us?

Enter Dead Sushi.

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Osaka is a city known for tasty traditional foods like okonomiyaki and takoyaki, the neon lights and mechanical signs of Dotonbori and a populace with the best sense of humor in Japan.

It’s only in a city like this that you could find something as in-your-face ridiculous as a series of statues we recently stumbled across outside of the Dotonbori Hotel Namba.

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Chinese Rip-off Better Than iPhone!? “Apple? No…this is Orange.”

While the iPhone4S is selling like hot cakes in Hong Kong, most of mainland China has yet to see an official release date.

Even so, you won’t see the people of China upset about it, oh no: while the rest of the world plays with their shiny new apples, China was just delivered a fresh batch of organes—the iOrgane GT6, to be exact. Read More

iShampo Goes On Sale In China, Claims Apple Endorsement

Sure China gets a bad rep for blatantly ripping off well-known brands – but, hey, at least they’re innovative about not innovating!

Take iShampo, which, if the bottle label claiming official an Apple license is to be believed, may be the world’s first collaboration between a tech company and hair care. Read More

Revolutionary Korean Umbrella UFOCAP Frees Both Hands So You Can Cover Your Face In Shame

It’s said that man has been using umbrellas to shield himself from the rain for roughly 4000 years. Over this time, the basic structure of the umbrella has never deviated far from the convenient, hand-held device we use even to this day.

However, ever visionaries of the future, the Koreans have taken inspiration from the limitless possibilities of space to bring us a new form of umbrella that surpasses the bounds of human invention. They have brought us…the UFOCAP. Read More

Siri Does Not Recognize English, Leads To Loss Of Self-Confidence

The iPhone4S finally arrived in Japan today, and thousands of people lined up outside their local Softbank or AU store, eager to get their hands on the phone when it hit the shelves at 8 am.

The most appealing new function of the iPhone4S for many people is the integrated voice interface, Siri. Apple claims that Siri enables you to easily send messages, check the weather, schedule meetings, and take care of a number of other traditionally text-based tasks just by using your voice.

Though it is currently not compatible with Japanese, the program is still available for use on Japanese iPhones. I made my way to an Apple Store to see if Siri would respond to my heavily-accented English but I had no luck. In fact, my broken attempts to inquire about the weather in English were interpreted so far off that I couldn’t help laughing.

Take a look at my techno-lingual struggle below. Read More

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