There are days you wake up and just want to table-flip the entire world. You want to scream at the top of a mountain about how people are such dumbasses! You’re just so irritated with everything that the next person you come in contact with will feel your wrath. Your conscience kicks in (usually before anything terrible happens) and whispers that Golden Rule in your ear: “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.” However, sometimes the lack of face to face contact during text message conversations allows us to forget that there is a real person on the other side. Just because you can’t see the reaction of the other person, it doesn’t mean you can say whatever you want.
For Japanese speakers, the solution is here. And it comes in the form of Shizuka-chan, our favorite character from Doraemon, and a smartphone app.
Toyota and Doraemon have collaborated on this one-of-a-kind app to bring you the kind of product that you’ve always needed: A way to turn your naughty, rude texts into pleasant kind ones. Available on the Japanese iTunes and Android stores, Shizukatta is free to use and excellent fun.
But who is “Shizuka”? Who is it that is turning our dirty language into clean and acceptable language? Born May 8 (Taurus), she’s sweet, kind and a very pretty girl who loves to help out her friends, especially Doraemon and Nobita. This makes her an excellent candidate for our texting purposes!
▼I’m Shizuka! Yoroshiku onegaishimasu! (Please take care of me !)
Let’s try this thing out already!
(Note: many of these words and phrases don’t correlate to an exact English word or phrase, but we’ve done our best to make it as accurate and fun as possible!)
Annoying → Please refrain from acting like the world is your stage
Lazy → Just a bit more effort!
Tired → Great job!
Stay away! → Bear hugs for everyone!
Fatty → Lovely
Dummy → Late bloomer
Douche → Welcoming fellow
So mad that it looks like there are lightning bolts coming out one’s head → Sparkling
This, you idiot → This, please!
Garbage → Treasure
Idiot → Fortunate person
Overly Familiar → So happy you allow us to be friends
Disgusting → It’s just a little too much
▼ “Stay away from me” becomes “Hug me tightly”
▼ And “fatty” becomes “lovely”
Just seeing the words change beautifully before our eyes makes the world so much more pleasant already. And these are only words…what happens when we put in full sentences?
You are seriously annoying. → Pretty please refrain from acting like the world is your stage.
I seriously hate you → I really want to be friends with you in the future!
I hate fake liars like you → I want to be friends with you who lies but it’s out of love in the future.
I’m so mad that lightning bolts are coming out of my head and making me bald → I am happy that I’m sparkling like the beautiful light of the sun.
Well…the sentences sure are positive now! Please try this helpful app the next time you are about to send a rude text in Japanese. Don’t worry! There are an infinite number of helpful ways to change your negative texts with the help of Shizuka-chan. You can also take a look at what other people asked her to change! And remember, this helpful app comes to us from Toyota, maker of cars.
Thanks for reading! “Otsu”….I mean “Thank you so much for all your hard reading. I really respect that you read this article all the way through!”
Images: RocketNews24, Doraemon Wiki
[ Read in Japanese ]