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Married Japanese men and women rank the things they miss most about single life

Jan 9, 2022

Interesting overlaps and differences between genders.

For most people anywhere in the world, marriage is a life changing decision. No matter how many people you dated before you found “the one,” marriage brings with it lots of new adventures and experiences, but it’s also not without its challenges.

And sometimes, those challenges make people look back fondly on their life when they were single.

Recently the Japanese web management service WebStar Marketing reported the results of a survey filled out by 500 married Japanese men and women asking them exactly that: what they missed most about their lives before getting married. 

▼ Shockingly, “being able to shave my legs alone” didn’t make the list.

Here are the results, first off with how many people overall ever missed single life:

Often miss it: 14.8 percent
Sometimes miss it: 56.4 percent
Don’t really miss it: 24.4 percent
Don’t miss it at all: 4.4 percent

When broken down by gender, 23.8 percent of men “often miss it” while only 11.2 percent of women do, and 27.5 percent of women “don’t really miss it” while only 16.8 percent of men do. So it seems as though there is a significant difference in men missing single life more than women on average.

Here are the top five specific reasons why they miss single life compared to married life, separated by gender:

Men
1. No free time
2. Can’t use my money how I want
3. Activities are limited
4. Frustrated with my spouse
5. Want more romance

Women
1. No free time
2. Activities are limited
3. Housework/childcare is difficult
4. Can’t use my money how I want
5. Dealing with relatives is difficult

Both men and women having “no free time” as their number one is understandable, though likely less due to marriage itself and more due to natural life progression. At some point, bills piling up means that we have to go to work every day, meaning less time for hobbies or friends, and doubly so if children are involved too.

Here’s some responses from those who said having “no free time” made them miss single life:

“My amount of personal time plummeted, and I can’t do what I want.” (Man, 20s)
“At night in bed I think to myself, ‘All day today, I didn’t have a minute to myself.'” (Woman, 30s)
“Ever since having kids I’ve had no time to myself, and I’ve missed single life.” (Woman, 40s)

“Activities are limited” also came in high for both men and women, with more detailed reasons including “having to consider the whole family whenever they want to do something,” and “can’t just spontaneously go on a trip.”

Other reasons include:

“I can’t go out with friends or travel with them on a whim, so it’s made me sometimes miss being single.” (Woman, 20s)
“It’s limited my personal relationships. I can’t hang out with my friends who are women.” (Man, 40s)

Overall, Japanese netizens seemed to agree with the responses:

“Single people want to get married. Married people want to be single again. The grass is always greener on the other side.”
“I mean, all of these are obvious things that happen when you get married. You give up some freedom for other things.”
“Personally I’ve never missed being single. And I’m a senior.”
“I’ve sometimes wished I didn’t get married, but overall I’m glad I did… although, maybe I wish it was with a different person.”
“But will they still miss single life when they’re old enough to be grandparents?”
“Always wanting more, never satisfied. That is what it means to be human.”

Good points all around, but one other thing to consider is how corona has affected these numbers. Would people think differently if they hadn’t been cooped up with their spouse for over two years?

We’ll just have to run the survey again once the pandemic has gone away. That shouldn’t be too much longer… right?

Source: IT Media via My Game News Flash
Top image: Pakutaso
Insert image: Pakutaso

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