Now you too can create a never-ending chain of plastic people sticking their fingers into each others’ buttholes.
If you’re not intimately familiar with the Japanese tradition of “kancho-ing,” consider yourself lucky. A kancho is when someone—typically a child—puts their hands together, sticks out their index fingers, then thrusts the pair of them them into some unsuspecting person’s butt. As a joke.
▼ Watch this kid demonstrate the one-handed kancho,
which trades off finesse points for raw speed.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PDR31i9mQ6g
Getting “kancho-ed” is typically a rite of passage among English teachers and other foreigners interacting with younger kids in Japan. Though the fingers usually don’t make it past the pants, it’s still not a pleasant experience, and most would rather not think about it.
But that hasn’t stopped one Japanese company from putting out new kancho figures. Japanese novelty figurine manufacturer Panda no Ana has recently released the aptly-named KAN-CHO figures/keychains to the world, so that we can all enjoy watching a good kancho whenever we’d like.
▼ The full set of all six KAN-CHO figures. If you listen closely, you can hear the elementary-school giggles echoing through the internet.
Who are these six characters? Why are they kancho-ing each other? Let’s take a closer look.
▼ First in line is the kacho (“boss” or “section head”)
who is getting kancho-ed by…
▼ …the high school girl, who is being kancho-ed by…
▼ …some dude whose name is “Rockin’ Roller,”
who is also getting kancho-ed by…
▼ …the OL (“office lady”), who is apparently getting kancho-ed by…
▼ …a brown bear?! Rilakkuma, is that you?
Either way, he’s getting kancho-ed by…
▼ …a pink bear (of course!) who is bringing it back
full circle and getting kancho-ed by the boss…
▼ …creating a beautiful, never-ending line of kancho-ing.
The KAN-CHO figures also double as charms to hang from cellphones and keychains, fulfilling kancho needs for the on-the-go lifestyle.
If that sounds like something you’re interested in, then get ready to break out some yen, since these things cost just 200 yen (US$1.80) each, and are available only at gachapon capsule toy crank machines in Japan. You may end up with more than one of each figure, but hey, that just means a longer, happier kancho line in the end, right?
For those who are on the fence about kancho-ing in general, we’ll leave you with some inspirational words from the toy manufacturer:
▼ Kancho-ing: bringing you closer to friends or family in the same way a
Chinese death simulator brings you closer to enjoying life.
Source/images: Takara TOMY A.R.T.S