Intrigued individuals predict huge spike in Japanese toilet paper consumption.
Since there’s really no point in beating around the bush after a headline like that, let’s dive right into it. Earlier this week, Japanese Twitter account @urasahou sent out a method for evaluating the size of one’s manhood, both in length and girth, without having to use a ruler, tape measure, optical scanning, or any other customary measuring apparatuses.
Instead, all you need is a roll of toilet paper, specifically the paper core at the center.
“We found a chart with an extremely simple way to determine whether you have a big penis or not,” tweeted @urasahou, accompanied by the above photos of a penis-substitute sponge being inserted into the toilet paper core.
According to the criteria for length:
● Glans does not protrude from far end of core: Small size
● Two centimeters (0.8 inches) or less of glans protrudes from core: Average size
● Glans protrudes from core: Huge cock
● Entire glans protrudes from core: Irregularly large
And for girth:
● Plenty of room to spare inside the core: Small size
● Snug fit: Average size
● Cannot insert without tearing the core: Giant cock
@urasahou went on to clarify that the test criteria are for use with a standard consumer-sized roll of Japanese toilet paper, and that using a roll meant for commercial use or sale in overseas markets, which could have a different length or diameter, will skew the results. No specific mention of whether the penis is supposed to be erect or not is mentioned, but most such self-evaluations are designed for the member to be at attention.
As to why @urasahou is sharing this information, which has been retweeted tens of thousands of times, the initial charts were accompanied by the suggestion that “If you use this and reevaluate the size of your penis, it’s less likely that someone who sleeps with you will then tell other people ‘He didn’t turn out to be as big as he says he was.’” However, as some online commenters have pointed out, the test is ostensibly meant to be performed after using up all the paper on the roll, so maybe we shouldn’t entirely rule out the possibility that this is a secret marketing campaign by Japanese toilet paper manufacturers to boost consumption as men furiously spool off the paper remaining on the roll when they go home tonight in order to satisfy their curiosity.
Source: Twitter/@urasahou via Otakomu
Featured image: @Twitter/@urasahou
Top image: Pakutaso