
Being overweight can negatively impact your life in a number of ways, but many of them don’t become apparent until after years of a hyper-calorific lifestyle. As such, vague warnings about lowered energy levels and increased medical costs at some indeterminable point in the future, or even a potentially early death, don’t always have enough of a feeling of immediacy to be compelling arguments to eat healthy and exercise.
On the other hand, a better chance at winning the approval of women is almost always a compelling argument, which is why a new motivational CD is being released in Japan with a number of anime and video game voice actresses alternatively offering encouragement to dieters and spitting contempt at the “pigs.”
As a relatively slender country, Japan doesn’t mince words when it comes to discussing obesity, so neither does the CD’s title: Attention, All You Pigs! If You Can’t Lose Weight After Listening to This, There’s No Hope for You! (Zenbuta ni Tsugu! Kore de Yasenkya Omae ha Owari Da! in Japanese). Featuring the vocal talents of eight up-and-coming voice actresses, the CD actually mixes up its track list beyond just insulting the listener’s appearance, although his girth is a common topic in all the dialogue on the spoken-word album.
Let’s take a look at a sample of the lines listeners will hear from voice actress Mayu Yoshioka…
“So it’s not enough to spend a sweet time with me? You want to eat something sweet, too?”
…Piyohina…
“If you could get out of that piggie costume you’re wearing, there just might be a cool guy underneath, you know?”
…Yoshino Aoyama…
“I’m thinking of your diet as a long-term operation, just like our relationship.”
…and Asuka Uzawa.
“Ordering the extra extra large garlic ramen? You pig, get started on your diet before I use your bones to make pork stock ramen broth!”
Rounding out the cast will be Chiho Kayanuma, Yuki Suzumori, Keiko Koshiro, and Haruka, the disc’s second single-name-only performer.
Attention, All You Pigs! If You Can’t Lose Weight After Listening to This, There’s No Hope for You! will be priced at 1,852 yen (US$16) and goes on sale November 18, conveniently timed so that dieters can have one last hurrah with their Halloween candy haul before putting in their earphones and getting earful about it.
Source: Jin
Images: Studio Livex


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