Customs authorities in South Korea are pleased to announce that they have cracked a smuggling ring in which gold was brought into the country via people’s cracks. Police have issued warrants for the arrest of the alleged mastermind of the crime, a 47-year-old man going by the name of Zou, along with eight accomplices.

According to reports, potential asses/mules were found in Taiwan and enticed by offers of a free stay in Seoul by Zou. If they agreed, then a certain number of gold pieces were placed (gingerly we hope) into the anal cavity.

Although the investigation is still ongoing, it is said that 270 gold pieces weighing 225g each were transported into South Korea over 11 separate incidents. This would suggest that a single smuggler might expect to carry 24 pieces for a total of around 5.5kg.

According to customs officers, the Taiwanese smugglers would meet someone in a Seoul subway station after passing through the airport. There the gold would be extracted from the person. After that, they could enjoy a night on the town in the nation’s capital before returning to Taiwan the next day, no doubt feeling as if they’re walking on air.

Internet wags in Japan chimed in on the incident with comments such as “looks smelly” and “looks like rectal prolapse”. Others speculated that “the gold will probably sold to Japan to be used as gold teeth.”

The total value of all gold smuggled is said to be around 88 million Taiwanese dollars (US$3M). Korean customs say they got tipped off when noticing a Taiwanese passenger “acting suspiciously” – dare we say, like they had something up their butts.

Source: CNA (Chinese) via Himasoku