On 17 April, a man whom the Chinese media is referring to as Zhang headed for the toilet to perform a crucial part of his morning routine. There would be no chance to catch up on the sports section of his paper this day, however.

During his bowel movement the man in his 40s experienced a severe pain in his anus. It wasn’t until the pain grew so intense that he could barely walk that Zhang decided to seek medical help.

And so begins a lesson on chewing your food properly.

Zhang was rushed to Zhengzhou People’s Hospital in Zhengzhou City, Henan. Staff in the proctology department began probing and found a foreign object obstructing the end of his digestive tract. Unable to identify it, the doctors braced themselves for an awkward conversation with Zhang about what it could be.

The patient wasn’t sure, but one possibility he could recall happened about a week earlier. He was out with some friends drinking and eating some spicy fried crayfish. Due to his drunken state Zhang admitted there was a chance he may have swallowed a piece of shell or claw.

Let’s take a moment to look at a crayfish claw and try to image what it would be like to have that pass through your system.

SF X 2

Doctors weren’t sure if Zhang’s suspicions were right at that time but knew that if they attempted to pull out the object, it could cause a tear resulting in major bleeding. In the end they decided to hospitalize him and prepare for surgery.

The procedure went off without a hitch and the staff were able to successfully remove a two-centimeter by two-centimeter (0.8-inch by 0.8-inch) crayfish claw from Zhang’s anus. Zhang was discharged two days later and is also expected to discharge himself normally again in the future.

To find out for sure, RocketNews24 consulted an expert on the matter: “Doctor” Hiroyuki “Buttman” Tanaka who hangs out by the 7-Eleven. We asked the “doctor” if it was possible any further damage could have been done to Zhang’s rectum to which he replied “Rectum?! It damn near killed him!”

Source: Livedoor News via Hachima Kiko (Japanese)
Top Image: Wikipedia – Hephaestos
Inset Image: Biology Junction