For pretty much every parent, there will eventually come that awkward day when their child asks questions about where babies come from. Parents have to tread a fine line with the information that impart, at once wanting to preserve their curious progeny’s innocence but also not wanting to send them out into the wild with tales of storks and cabbage patches.

Thanks to Ryo Shirakawa, now there’s a fun way to teach kids about sexual reproduction without actually having to deal with it: Sperm Vs Egg (Seishi Vs Ranshi; localized to Seed and Egg in English) for smartphones.

Envision this scenario if you will. A young girl walks into the kitchen while her father skims the financial section of the newspaper and sips on a cup of coffee. She asks about her new baby brother, saying, “Daddy, how did Tommy get inside mommy’s tummy?”

Momentarily caught off guard by this question loaded with sexually explicit information, the father panics. Then he remembers that he has the hit game Sperm Vs Egg on his iPhone and boots that puppy up! “It’s er… ah… Oh, here! This will show you.” Now that’s some clutch parenting.

Sperm Vs Egg accurately simulates the conditions inside the human uterus – dark and full of viruses. The player must navigate an ovum through the virus minefield to collect as many spermatozoons as possible.

However, so as not to bore the child with too much dull science the game has a back story, as outlined on the App Store page:

It is the year 2999 and humans are close to extinction. Despite their best efforts, mankind has been unable to produce children for many years. Many theories have been tested, but none have been successful. Hope grows dim. Slowly but surely the women have grown older, eventually reaching menopause, unable to give birth. When suddenly, a special egg was found, able to fertilize more than once. This is our chance!!! She needs your help! Fertilize as many good eggs as you can while avoiding the bad viruses. With your help we can populate the earth!

With a dramatic backdrop and authentic biology intermingled, there’s no way a curious tyke won’t walk away informed and well-adjusted while you can get back to keeping an eye on the Goldman Sachs Commodities Index.

The games itself is actually quite well made. The ovum handles like a dream, with the player directing it around the screen using the virtual control pad that is comfortably laid out on the screen. The challenge level is, however, high, leading to games that last a mere ten seconds later on, which rather fittingly is about as long as it takes for real conception.

Online reviews have thus far been positive, calling Sperm Vs Egg “Addictive” and one that people want to “play over and over.” So, whether you have a youngster or just want a fun game to kill a few minutes, stop on by the App Store for the free download. Just remember to turn the volume down when playing in public. The moaning woman sound effect might make people think you’re up to something less wholesome.

Source: App Store via IT Media (Japanese)

▼ My high score was 99 babies in a single egg. Seven higher than I got in real life.