
It’s not every day that an enormous blonde-haired bear of a man comes to your school, agrees to play a quick game of rugby with you and then proceeds to knock you on your 10-year-old arse rather than let you win the ball.
But then, it’s not every day that London mayor Boris Johnson is visiting Japan…
“Hey, your mayor’s in Japan!” an American friend of mine said to me via Facebook message earlier this week.
“I’m not from London, and that man is nothing to do with me, I promise you,” I replied, awaiting something awful.
“Whatever. Here he is speaking Japanese lol.”
After retrieving my eyeballs from deep inside my skull following a cringe so violent I thought I might never see again, I got to wondering what ol’ Boris, the London mayor whose gaffes routinely make the headlines in my homeland, would get up to during his four-day sojourn in Japan.
“He’s probably going to be in meetings all day;” I told to myself as I read more about the purpose of Boris’ visit, “what harm could he possibly do?”
Well…
It turns out that, what with the two nations I have at various points in my life called home currently buzzing about the Rugby World Cup and Japan’s dazzling display on the pitch, London’s lovable/lunatic mayor agreed to take part in a small “street rugby” tournament a group of elementary school kids were having earlier today.
Little did the children, know, however, that the mayor was quite the experienced sportsman and, in true British style and wanting to ensure that the kids grew up knowing that life is awful and full of hardships, resolved to knock one 10-year-old boy to the ground rather than lose the ball in front of parents and reporters.
The boy, named in reports as one Toki Sekiguchi, was seemingly unhurt following the tackle and, once he’d put his little cap back on his head, was quick to dust himself off. All the same, I have a feeling any foreign language teachers visiting Toki’s school from now on are going to have a heck of a job coaxing any English out of him…
▼ “Yes! I am king! Soon I will rule all of Great Britain!”
▼ “Haha, Mr Boris. I’m going tackle you!”
▼ “I don’t think so, son…”
Cringe…
H/T Twitter/Mashable
Featured/insert images: YouTube/Inferno Productions




Beautiful exclusive Totoro tenugui towel is a gift from Disney to Ghibli physical media buyers
Brand new Shinkansen bullet train unveiled in Japan… but it won’t carry passengers
Sanrio eco-friendly plushies are here for the earth-conscious lovers of all things kawaii
Studio Ghibli releases anime T-shirts that pay homage to one of Hayao Miyazaki’s most personal films
Cup Noodle releases cold-water instant ramen in Japan, but can it really be made with just cold water?
Beautiful exclusive Totoro tenugui towel is a gift from Disney to Ghibli physical media buyers
Brand new Shinkansen bullet train unveiled in Japan… but it won’t carry passengers
Sanrio eco-friendly plushies are here for the earth-conscious lovers of all things kawaii
Studio Ghibli releases anime T-shirts that pay homage to one of Hayao Miyazaki’s most personal films
Cup Noodle releases cold-water instant ramen in Japan, but can it really be made with just cold water?
Japanese convenience store releases Japanese convenience store-flavor fried chicken
Hatsune Miku collaborates with Hokusai’s art in new Vocaloid ukiyo-e illustration series [Pics]
Giant Snorlax, other snoozing Pokémon appear in Yokohama for Pokémon Sleeping Faces Research [Pics]
Taco sandwiches appear in Japan with new Lunch Pack sandwich pocket flavor[Taste test]
Japan’s “edible fireworks” wagashi sweets return, but only for a limited time [Photos]
Japan now has human refrigerators inspired by Japanese vending machines
Cup Noodle unveils first-ever cold-water instant ramen in Japan
Family Mart’s new Tokyo flagship convenience store doesn’t feel convenient, but is that a problem?
Starbucks Japan releases new Discovery Series collection celebrating local regions and traditions
Teen girl in Japan refuses to be victim, personally escorts train pervert to police for arrest
Is Japan’s tourism boom slowing down? Foreign visitor numbers fall for first time in five years
Evangelion beautifully reimagined as iconic classical Japanese folding screen art series [Photos]
Japan announces sudden 400-percent increase in visa fees for foreigners entering the country
Studio Ghibli has a new anime out, and there’s only one place in the world where you can see it
Salomon releases Japan-exclusive Mt. Fuji hiking gear that doubles as an amazing souvenir
Japan triples departure tax, foreign tourists and locals now must pay more to leave country
Japan launches first overnight Shinkansen bullet train between Tokyo and Osaka this summer
Japanese ninja certification exam attracts 131 candidates from Japan and abroad
Family Mart opens new “Famima” flagship store in Tokyo that’s like a tourist attraction
Japan’s human washing machines will go on sale to general public, demos to be held in Tokyo
Starbucks Japan releases new drinkware and goods for Valentine’s Day
Starbucks Japan releases new sakura goods and drinkware for cherry blossom season 2026
Japan’s newest Shinkansen has no seats…or passengers [Video]
Put sesame oil in your coffee? Japanese maker says it’s the best way to start your day【Taste test】
Japan reportedly adding Japanese language skill requirement to most common foreigner work visa
Japanese convenience store releases Japanese convenience store-flavor fried chicken
Hatsune Miku collaborates with Hokusai’s art in new Vocaloid ukiyo-e illustration series [Pics]
Giant Snorlax, other snoozing Pokémon appear in Yokohama for Pokémon Sleeping Faces Research [Pics]
Taco sandwiches appear in Japan with new Lunch Pack sandwich pocket flavor[Taste test]
Japan’s “edible fireworks” wagashi sweets return, but only for a limited time [Photos]
Studio Ghibli’s new moving keychains are the angry, adorable bugs from Nausicaa [Photos]
Teen girl in Japan refuses to be victim, personally escorts train pervert to police for arrest
Japan now has human refrigerators inspired by Japanese vending machines
Japanese curry rice burger gets all the attention in Mos Burger’s new birthday celebration campaign
Family Mart’s new Tokyo flagship convenience store doesn’t feel convenient, but is that a problem?
Japan’s popular curry chain Cocoichi has an elusive delivery-only noodle menu
Starbucks Japan releases new Discovery Series collection celebrating local regions and traditions
Starbucks Japan unveils new peach milk pudding drink that’s like a decadent dessert
Mos Burger opens Mosh Burger & Bar in Ginza, but is it fated to be a short-lived sensation?