
It’s not every day that an enormous blonde-haired bear of a man comes to your school, agrees to play a quick game of rugby with you and then proceeds to knock you on your 10-year-old arse rather than let you win the ball.
But then, it’s not every day that London mayor Boris Johnson is visiting Japan…
“Hey, your mayor’s in Japan!” an American friend of mine said to me via Facebook message earlier this week.
“I’m not from London, and that man is nothing to do with me, I promise you,” I replied, awaiting something awful.
“Whatever. Here he is speaking Japanese lol.”
After retrieving my eyeballs from deep inside my skull following a cringe so violent I thought I might never see again, I got to wondering what ol’ Boris, the London mayor whose gaffes routinely make the headlines in my homeland, would get up to during his four-day sojourn in Japan.
“He’s probably going to be in meetings all day;” I told to myself as I read more about the purpose of Boris’ visit, “what harm could he possibly do?”
Well…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZYZ-Aidn8oo
It turns out that, what with the two nations I have at various points in my life called home currently buzzing about the Rugby World Cup and Japan’s dazzling display on the pitch, London’s lovable/lunatic mayor agreed to take part in a small “street rugby” tournament a group of elementary school kids were having earlier today.
Little did the children, know, however, that the mayor was quite the experienced sportsman and, in true British style and wanting to ensure that the kids grew up knowing that life is awful and full of hardships, resolved to knock one 10-year-old boy to the ground rather than lose the ball in front of parents and reporters.
The boy, named in reports as one Toki Sekiguchi, was seemingly unhurt following the tackle and, once he’d put his little cap back on his head, was quick to dust himself off. All the same, I have a feeling any foreign language teachers visiting Toki’s school from now on are going to have a heck of a job coaxing any English out of him…
▼ “Yes! I am king! Soon I will rule all of Great Britain!”
▼ “Haha, Mr Boris. I’m going tackle you!”
▼ “I don’t think so, son…”
Cringe…
H/T Twitter/Mashable
Featured/insert images: YouTube/Inferno Productions




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