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In a somewhat complicated story we’re not sure is heartwarming or kind of devastating, three middle-aged Tokyo fishermen have accomplished what experts thought was impossible by single (triple?)-handedly bringing an area fish species back from the brink of extinction by illegally catching them.

The three men, according to their accounts, caught the fish and, upon learning that they were on the endangered species list, contacted experts and aquariums for advice on breeding them – either for the sake of fishkind or for the sake of tons of delicious illicit fish meat.

See, the fish in question, the rare Tokyo bitterling (Tanakia tanago) supposedly shares with pandas the same adorable trait of not having any interest in f’&%ng to save their species and, once they’d dipped down to endangered levels, experts had been having a hard time getting them to proliferate again.

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Of course, it’s illegal to catch endangered fish – yes, even in whale-hating Japan – so the Tokyo Consumer and Environmental Protection Division sent the men a court summons, which they presumably showed up to with bags upon bags of happy little fish.

So successful were the men’s efforts that they turned their 28 fish catch into 1,121 happily fornicating Tokyo bitterlings. Unfortunately, for all their selflessness and restraint in front of all that delicious endangered fish meat, the fish had forgotten the men’s kindness approximately three seconds after being caught. Time will tell how long the court’s memory is.

Source: My Game News Flash
Images: Tsuzuki Nikki, Inokashira Park Zoo