The Egyptian pyramids stand strong in the scorching heat of the desert, as they have for over 4,500 years. It is said that the techniques that went into building them were well beyond those of human civilization at the time. They are mysteries wrapped inside of enigmas that continue to fascinate us from afar.

And apparently there is also a pyramid in Tochigi Prefecture, which really cuts down on the travel expenses for those of us in Japan wanting to bask in their wonder. One such spendthrift adventurer was RocketNews24’s own Masanuki Sunakoma, who went to investigate.

Masanuki was driving through the idyllic country-side about 50 kilometers (31 miles) north of Utsunomiya in Tochigi prefecture and taking in the tranquil beauty of it all. In his hectic life as a RocketNews24 correspondent it was nice to get these moments of serenity once in a while.

Then, suddenly, a pyramid appeared from between the trees, its orange-yellow peak piercing straight into the blue sky. The sight startled Masanuki so much he jolted the steering wheel and nearly swerved his car into a rice paddy.

There was no mistake. That was a pyramid.

As he drove closer, Masanuki also noticed a giant sphinx installed at the base of the pyramid. The great cat-person sat there defiantly as if to say “I’m something different, ain’t I?” The entire facility put out an intense aura compelling those who come near to ask, “Why here?”

As Masanuki neared the entrance to the pyramid, signs in hieroglyphics (that luckily looked exactly like modern Japanese) read “Pyramid Genki Onsen” and “The World’s First Combination of Hot Spring and Pyramid.”

Our reporter was amazed. To be the “world’s first,” this must be a truly ancient structure. And much like the pyramids of Giza, the building techniques here were way ahead of their time. The aluminum siding was an especially good choice to cut down on heating and cooling costs.

Masanuki made his way into the bowels of the pyramid to find the chamber which contained the hot spring. The corridors were adorned with Egyptian themed art that by today’s standards might seem kitschy, but were likely the height of style so many thousands of years ago.

There were also artifacts from other cultures such as an oriental water-bearer statue and white Anglo-Saxon protestant potted fern. They may have been gifts by the leaders of these societies at one point in time.

There was also a shut door which read “Earth Heritage” along the way. Masanuki decided to leave that one alone. After all, pyramids are notorious for their booby traps.

Finally, he found the familiar curtain which read otokoyu, signifying the bath for men. In here he could simultaneously soak in hot spring water from the Earth and the energy of the cosmos focused through the pyramid.

He wanted to take photos inside but every time he tried a spirit guardian would manifest itself in the form of a little old lady and start yelling at him. Instead, Masanuki simply sat in the water and cosmic rays thinking about all that money he had wasted traveling to Egypt.

▼ So naive back then…

After his bath, our reporter stopped by the “Power Space” intended for meditation. He charged his chakras by sitting in the lotus position next to the nightmare tree for a bit.

This pyramid also comes equipped with an outdoor bath, sauna, and foot bath that has a picturesque Texas Chainsaw ambiance in front. Access to all of this costs 550 yen (US$4.60) which, adjusting for inflation, would have been the equivalent of 160 kajillion yen ($1.34 kajillion) in 2,000 BC. Truly this was a place for emperors.

▼ Minnah and McKenzie Mouse were also there to remind us that copyright infringement isn’t all that hard to skirt around.

And so Masanuki had confirmed that there is definitely a pyramid in Tochigi Prefecture, and it is very much like those found in Egypt. They’re all pointy, orangey, and full of mysteries.

However, unlike the Giza Pyramids, this one has cabins you can stay in for 2,500 yen ($21) per night.

It also has Power Cards on sale for your convenience. Now for only 800 yen ($6.70) you can get some cosmic energy on the go!

With all that, if you can only see one pyramid in you life, we think the choice is obvious.

Related: Pyramid Genki Onsen

Images ©RocketNews24
Original article by Masanuki Sunakoma

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