
They say variety is the spice of life, so this Japanese website is ready to add some piquancy to your Class 2 bathroom proceedings.
Imagine eating the same exact thing for every meal, every day. How long do you think it would take before that became thoroughly, soul-crushingly dull?
And yet, so few of us question this sort of monotony at the other end of the digestive process. Now, though, there’s a guiding light illuminating the untapped variety of where the sun don’t shine. Yes, by following the illustrated examples of Japanese website 48 Ways to Poop, you could be dropping a deuce in a new way every day for nearly seven weeks (or a somewhat shorter period of time, if you have a diet that’s particularly rich in fiber or fried foods).
As a comprehensive compendium of colonic commuting, 48 Ways to Poop includes many of the time-tested standards, such as the Orthodox and the Inner Thigh.
Many of us have also employed the Bellyache and the Air Seat at one time or another, as the former is a favorite of those who’ve eaten too much chili, and the latter is the savior of those with the ill fate of using the toilet after them.
But with these mundane methods accounted for, 48 Ways to Poop quickly progresses to more inventive poo plans, such as the Upright Forward Bend…
…the dynamic Four-Point Brace…
…and the demure Sidesaddle.
Sports and athletic fans will want to try the empowering Sanchin, named for the kata practice routine of Okinawan karate…
…and the Ina Bauer, which shares its name with famed German figure skater who made this pose a cornerstone of her performances (on the ice, not in the bathroom).
If you’re more about the mental than the physical, the Meditation may be a way to align your aura as you void your bowels.
Also perfect for a stoic stool session: The Seiza (Japanese-Style Kneeling).
Those with a lack of physical affection in their daily lives yet an abundance of clearance behind their commodes could be the ideal practitioners of the Lid Hug.
Craving a challenge? Sounds like it’s time for you to attempt the Y-Pose…
…or the Tokoroten, which refers to a type of limp, noodle-like gelatin that’s part of traditional Japanese cuisine.
And finally, for those looking for the ultimate test of their toilet technique, behold: the Handstand!
▼ If your trajectory and posture aren’t just right, there are so, so many ways this could end badly.
So far, 48 Ways to Poop has only revealed 50 percent of its ideas, with the remaining 24 set to be revealed on the website sometime later this month. In the meantime, though, you’ve should have more than enough knowledge to last you through a couple of boxes of bran flakes.
Related: 48 Ways to Poop
Source: IT Media
Images: 48 Ways to Poop (edited by RocketNews24)
Follow Casey on Twitter, where his personal pooping techniques are a closely guarded secret.














Testing Japan’s stick-on, mask-your-pooping-sound speakers against our coworker’s butt【Video】
Poop Kanji-Drill toilet paper is the best way to accomplish your Japanese studying doo-ties
Gaming toilet design could be Japan’s greatest bathroom contribution since washlet bidets
One of Japan’s best ramen chains has secret toilet paper stash in restrooms for emergency pooping
Someone crashed a car into Japan’s oldest restroom
Hayao Miyazaki says Happy New Year to Studio Ghibli fans with new art for Year of the Horse
Check out this 8m robot that appeared on Tokyo’s waterfront【Video】
Display Your Own Animations on Your Bicycle Wheel with ANIPOV, Goes on Sale January 2013
Pizza Hut Japan’s hot lucky bags are perfect for a New Year’s pizza party
Tom Cruise brings Mission: Impossible – Final Reckoning to Tokyo with special surprises
Star Wars and classic Japanese things aren’t done mashing yet! 【Photos】
Snoopy to your cleaning rescue — and he even comes with his own doghouse power source!
We found possibly the quietest Japanese-style hotel in Tokyo’s bustling Shinjuku district
Domino’s Japan’s New Cheese Volcano Pizza is a game-changer that’s about to go global
Now you can be the coolest ninja on the block with these awesome origami shuriken
Starbucks Japan ready to get Year of the Horse started with adorable drinkware and plushies【Pics】
7-Eleven Japan’s ramen-cooking robot whipped us up a bowl of noodles【Taste test】
Cyberpunk anime meets traditional culture in Ghost in the Shell gold leaf Japanese changing screens
7 great places to see Mt. Fuji from without having to climb it
Hello Kitty Choco Egg figures are an adorable trip through three periods of Japanese pop culture【Pics】
Japan’s otoshidama tradition of giving kids money at New Year’s gets a social welfare upgrade
Lacquerware supplier to emperor of Japan and Pokémon team up for new tableware
Sumo Sanrio! Hello Kitty and pals team up with Japan Sumo Association for new merch【Pics】
Can a dirty butthole make you filthy rich in Japan? We’re starting a New Year’s lottery experiment
7-Eleven Japan starts new temporary luggage storage service in over 300 branches
Disillusionment at Tsukiji’s tourist-target prices led us to a great ramen restaurant in Tokyo
Starbucks teams up with 166-year-old Kyoto doll maker for Year of the Horse decorations【Photos】
Tokyo considering law requiring more trash cans following litter increase in heavily touristed area
Tokyo’s Tsukiji sushi neighborhood asks tour groups to stay away for the rest of the month
Nintendo’s Kirby now delivering orders at Kura Sushi restaurants, but not in Japan
Tokyo event lets you travel back in time, for free, to celebrate 100 years since Showa era start
Sanrio theme park in Japan announces plans to expand into a Sanrio resort
Japan may add Japanese language proficiency, lifestyle classes to permanent foreign resident requirements
Survey asks foreign tourists what bothered them in Japan, more than half gave same answer
Japan’s human washing machines will go on sale to general public, demos to be held in Tokyo
Japan’s deadliest food claims more victims, but why do people keep eating it for New Year’s?
We deeply regret going into this tunnel on our walk in the mountains of Japan
Studio Ghibli releases Kodama forest spirits from Princess Mononoke to light up your home
Major Japanese hotel chain says reservations via overseas booking sites may not be valid
Put sesame oil in your coffee? Japanese maker says it’s the best way to start your day【Taste test】
No more using real katana for tourism activities, Japan’s National Police Agency says
Starbucks Japan reveals new sakura drinkware collection, inspired by evening cherry blossoms
Updated cherry blossom forecast shows extra-long sakura season for Japan this year
Pikachu, I poo with you! Official Pokémon toilet created in Japan for young fans
Japan’s new custom-order cat-theme toilet paper lets you wipe your butt with cuteness
Pooping has never been more dramatic than it is with this Japanese toilet “sound shogun”【Video】
The day our male reporter used a women’s restroom with other dudes and they learned about otohime
The Japan Poop Society is making movements to protect people’s health
Japan’s bidet toilet capsule toys are here, but are they strong enough to wash your butt for you?
Keep your skin clear with a poop smear! We swear it’s not as crazy as it sounds
Japan’s Poop Lucky Bag is a sack of crap, but is it the good kind?
You can now get paid 5,000 yen for your poop in Japan, but only if your poop is good enough
U.S.A. now the fastest-growing market for Japan’s high-tech toilets, now selling quicker than ever
Poop-shaped pudding makers on sale now in Japan
American comedian Jimy Kimmel was blown away by Japan’s bathrooms【Video】
Japanese toilet fans rejoice — bidet-style washlet water guns are here!
Japanese mobile game has anime girls asking you detailed questions about your poop
Japan’s craziest train station has a giant with light-up eyes growing out of its wall【Photos】
Leave a Reply