A victory for freedom of eats.

The ruling Liberal Democratic Party has been hard at work drafting a bill to criminalize desecration of the Japanese flag. It’s apparently a pressing matter, even though I’ve never seen anyone do anything bad to a flag before. In fact, I rarely see the flag used much at all, good or bad. But it’s perhaps in anticipation of continuing protests to the current administration’s efforts to roll back the pacifist elements of the constitution that they feel this is a priority.

There has been a lot of discussion about the specific details of this law as it rubs up against people’s freedom of expression. One major point is what exactly constitutes the national flag of Japan. Especially since it’s just a red circle on a white background, I could drop some spaghetti sauce on my shirt and end up wearing the flag. So, how is it legally different from a real flag?

According to the latest revision of the bill, the flag is defined as generally made of cloth or paper, primarily displayed on poles as a sign or decoration, and usable in real society. This means the Japanese flags in the virtual world are fair game, which is great news for my upcoming smartphone game Flag Blaster 3000.

But where does that leave those little toothpick flags that restaurants in Japan stick in the potato salad or rice of kids’ meals? They’re made of paper, displayed as a decoration, and used in society.

▼ The countries are usually randomly given out, so there’s only a small chance of getting a Japanese flag a lot of the time.

Since they technically fit the legal definition of a flag, the makers of the bill decided to explicitly exclude kids’ meal flags from the law. This means you wouldn’t have to worry about getting in trouble with the law if you attacked some ketchup rice extra hard and made a mess of your flag. Another exemption involves flags depicted in paintings. That being said, destroying other people’s paintings can land you in a whole other spot of trouble.

Online commenters have been less than happy that this is what the government is choosing to spend its time on when so many other things in the country seems to be getting less and less bearable.

“This is what they’re discussing?”
“They can’t seriously be spending time on kids’ meal flags.”
“Just ignoring all of our other anxieties.”
“Didn’t they recently say they didn’t have time to discuss same-sex marriage or separate surnames?”
“I should get a tattoo of the flag. Then no one will hurt me.”
“Just copy whatever they do in France and get it done with.”
“When I was a kid, I used to carefully save my kids’ meal flag and take it home. I’d usually forget all about it 10 minutes after that.”

The draft bill also includes a provision that freedom of expression should be considered when pressing charges. According to the wording, artistic expression, such as live-action films, using real national flags as props would be exempt if considered socially acceptable.

That last part about being “considered socially acceptable” is still a matter of contention in the bill, since it is greatly open to interpretation. I think we can all agree that Godzilla torching the flag with its atomic breath is completely acceptable because that big lug just doesn’t know any better. But if King Kong hurls a colossal turd at one, the issue becomes much less black and white.

Hopefully, they get this all sorted out soon, and maybe go back to working on things like how no one can afford stuff anymore, and why we can’t even secure the resources to make colored bags of potato chips.

Source: Mainichi Shimbun, Hachima Kiko
Photos ©SoraNews24
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