Abuse of the complimentary alcohol service leads to a rude, wet awakening.

It’s roughly a 12-and-a-half-hour flight from Chicago’s O’Hare to Narita International Airport, the primary gateway to Tokyo for travelers from overseas. That’s a lot of time in the air, but since alcohol is complimentary on international flights, you can kill time by having a few stiff drinks, and still have time to fit in several hours of sleep before you land in Japan.

Unfortunately, it seems as though Denish Kishorchandra Parekh’s plan wasn’t to get comfortably buzzed during his journey to Japan, but ridiculously drunk. Parekh, a 24-year-old American engineer, is said to have had four glasses of champagne and also a round of sake during his flight on ANA last Friday, and while that’s not a Herculean amount of alcohol consumption, it was enough that while the plane was soaring across the sky, he was seen urinating on one of his fellow passengers.

▼ The captain had not turned on the no-peeing-on-people light, because of the tragically incorrect assumption that no one could be so stupid as to need such guidance.

The target of Parekh’s stream of liquid asininity was a 50-year-old Japanese businessman, currently living in Illinois, who was dozing in his seat two rows behind Parekh in the business class section. Police reports don’t indicate whether Parekh had moved into the aisle, peeing on the man in the world’s most disgusting flanking maneuver, or if he sent a stream of piss arcing over the row of seats between the two of them. Either way, it’s certain that the businessman had expected a more pleasant flight when dishing out the premium above the cost of a coach ticket.

When the flight crew realized what Parekh was doing, he was swiftly restrained, and when the plane landed at Narita, Japanese police officers were on hand to welcome him to Japan by immediately arresting him for assault.

Parekh and the man did not know each other, and hadn’t been involved in any argument or altercation prior to the incident. Police reports don’t indicate whether Parekh consciously chose to urinate on the man out of random spite, or simply wanted to relieve himself as soon as possible and lacked the human decency to consider where he was shooting his stream. Parekh hasn’t been particularly helpful in clearing that up either, as he is denying the criminal accusations with the flimsy-as-a-sheet-of-single-ply defense that “I was drunk, and I don’t remember.”

The authorities have not issued a statement as to whether Parekh faces jail time or simply is a candidate for immediate deportation. Either way, it’s doubtful he’ll get to enjoy any of the all-you-can-drink offers at restaurants in Japan, and when the time comes for him to be put on a plane back home, we suspect it’s going to be very hard to find anyone willing to sit next to him.

Sources: Shirabee via Niconico News via Jin, FNN Prime, Breaking News Japan, Japan Today
Top image: Pakutaso
Insert image: Pakutaso

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