
It might sound like a match made in heaven (or at least a lovey-dovey romance anime), but two otaku don’t always make the right combination.
Getting married means sharing your life with someone, so obviously compatible lifestyles are a must for any couple looking to tie the knot. And since otakuism is, for many fans, a rather comprehensive part of their lifestyle, many otaku feel their best chance for a happy love life would come from marrying another otaku.
There are even otaku-oriented dating services set up to provide fans looking for love with just such a match. However, Japanese marriage consultant and Twitter user @hikarin22 says that marrying another otaku isn’t necessarily a sure path to long-term marital bliss, and instead recommends looking for a partner with a different set of traits.
オタクが結婚して幸せになれるのは同じ趣味のオタクじゃなくて、オタク趣味とそれにお金と時間をかけることを容認してくれる人です。相手がオタクかどうかはぶっちゃけ関係無いです。相手の趣味に対して理解のないオタクや金銭感覚の違うオタクだと例え相手がオタクでも喧嘩になります。
— ひかりん@婚活菩薩 (@hikarin22) October 26, 2018
“The kind of person an otaku will be happy being married to isn’t another otaku. It’s a person who’ll understand and accept the amount of time and money you spend on your otaku hobbies, and that honestly doesn’t depend at all on whether your spouse is an otaku or not. Even if you’re married to an otaku, if you aren’t understanding of each other’s hobbies or have different attitudes about money and finances, you’ll just end up fighting.”
It’s a pretty convincing argument, While the word “otaku” most commonly gets used to refer to anime enthusiasts, it also gets applied to hard-core fans of video games, idol music, electronics, and a handful of other non-sports or mainstream show business hobbies. And even if you and your potential romantic partner happen to fall into the same broad category of otaku, a quick look at any Internet forum devoted to, for instance, anime or video games will show you that there’s still plenty of opportunity for uncivil disagreement between fellow fans of the medium as a whole.
You might expect your gamer beaux to have no problem with your dropping a chunk of change for a gatcha-style mobile game, only to find out that he’s extremely frustrated about how you’re wasting money on random loot boxes when you should be using it to pay for extra DLC characters for SNK Heroines, since that way you’d know exactly what you’re getting. Likewise, you might think three seasons of Slayers DVDs for 40 bucks is a bargain, while your otaku girlfriend gnashes her teeth at the fact that not only are you buying physical media for a series that’s 20 years old, but you’re throwing your money away on a low-def version.
▼ But if she doesn’t appreciate the comedy of the Noonsa episodes, you might have to ask yourself if you could really be happy spending the rest of your life with her.
Because of those potential pitfalls into otaku-versus-otaku squabbling, @hikarin22’s tweet was met with widespread agreement by other Twitter users, who left comments such as:
“That’s exactly right. I need to remember to thank my wife for being so understanding of my otakuism.”
“It’s important to have similar attitudes about spending. I couldn’t be with someone who keeps spending money on their hobbies even while we’re struggling to make ends meet elsewhere in our budget.”
“Otaku might seem all the same at first glance, but there’s a lot of variety even within the same genre.”
“The best thing is to try to find someone who spends a similar amount on their hobbies per month as you do.”
“My boyfriend is a game otaku and plays for hours a day. I’m usually sitting next to him reading a book and watching him play. I don’t know anything about games, but the visuals are beautiful, so for me it feels like we’re watching a movie together.”
Even Tokyo’s most prominent otaku matchmaking service advises its clients to have interests outside the traditional otaku spheres, in order to help them be a better-rounded, more relatable person. Because while it’s nice having a spouse who enjoys doing otaku stuff with you, it’s even nicer having one who’s understanding and accommodating of your level of passion for your hobby, even if he or she can’t match it.
Source: Twitter/@hikarin22 via Hachima Kiko
Top image: Pakutaso
Insert image ©SoraNews24
Follow Casey on Twitter, where he’d like to thank his wife for being understanding of his buying three seasons of Slayers DVDs for 40 bucks.


Seven reasons why an otaku should date another otaku (and one reason maybe not to)
Could you marry an otaku? Japanese people rank the geek hobbies they’d let slide for love
Large majority of otaku in Japan want to keep being otaku after having kids, survey says
Japanese men and woman both have the same top requirement for a spouse in konkatsu poll
New matchmaking service promises to weed out fake otaku with pre-registration diagnostic test
Studio Ghibli releases new Kiki’s Delivery Service Jiji music box for anime fans
Japan’s new beer glass is designed to force you to drink…water [Video]
This beautiful rural Japan river is a great alternative to touristy summer retreats [Photos]
Are Japan’s room-temperature curry packets the boxed lunch heroes we’ve been looking for? [Taste test]
Studio Ghibli theme park announces new expansion saluting a previously off-limits anime
New Japanese vending machine at Shinkansen station sells cups of ice on platform
Police ask Kumamoto residents to not get blackout drunk as much during earthquake relief efforts
Kumamoto earthquake may have created Japan’s newest hot spring inside flooded restaurant [Video]
Japanese convenience store food gets turned into hyper-realistic stationery you can peel open
Tokyo is getting a branch of famous Los Angeles hot dog chain Pink’s with Japan-exclusive items
Pokémon Center Online designates first Pokémon items that will require Japanese ID card to buy
Japanese toilet aims to attract foreign tourists but not everybody is happy about it
Anime fan in Japan arrested for ordering and cancelling over 4.3 billion yen in anime merch
Starbucks Japan teams up with Traveler’s Company for new stationery and goods collection
Japanese vending machine sells freshly squeezed lemon juice with a futuristic light show
Beautiful Totoro bonsai figure needs no watering, makes soothing rain showers whenever you want
End of a manga era as Weekly Shonen Jump’s circulation drops under one million
Kochia calling: Right now is a great off-season season to visit this beautiful Japanese park
Tokyo subway installing new ticket gates that don’t accept payment through Suica or other IC cards
Japan now has human refrigerators inspired by Japanese vending machines
Hatsune Miku collaborates with Hokusai’s art in new Vocaloid ukiyo-e illustration series [Pics]
New Shinkansen luggage drop-off system begins in Japan, making train travel even easier
Studio Ghibli releases anime T-shirts that pay homage to one of Hayao Miyazaki’s most personal films
Air-conditioned dress shirts arrive in Japan to save working professionals from sweltering heat
Japanese Shinkansen becomes an overnight hotel for three nights this summer
Cup Noodle unveils first-ever cold-water instant ramen in Japan
99-year-old woman rescued while attempting to climb Mt. Fuji
Japan announces sudden 400-percent increase in visa fees for foreigners entering the country
Japan’s human washing machines will go on sale to general public, demos to be held in Tokyo
Studio Ghibli has a new anime out, and there’s only one place in the world where you can see it
Starbucks Japan releases new drinkware and goods for Valentine’s Day
Starbucks Japan releases new sakura goods and drinkware for cherry blossom season 2026
Japan’s newest Shinkansen has no seats…or passengers [Video]
Japanese ninja certification exam attracts 131 candidates from Japan and abroad
Salomon releases Japan-exclusive Mt. Fuji hiking gear that doubles as an amazing souvenir
Put sesame oil in your coffee? Japanese maker says it’s the best way to start your day【Taste test】
Is the ideal spouse someone who’s your best friend or your war buddy? Japanese singles sound off
Eight reasons otaku men are unpopular with women, according to Japanese Twitter list
Japanese men share what they can put up with in a girlfriend, but would be marriage deal-breakers
Otaku dating service advises singles to have interests other than anime
Anime fan’s boyfriend asks her to throw out her 2-D crush, she gets rid of something else instead
Japanese otaku singles parties say they only want guys who are otaku, but don’t look like otaku
Japanese women rank the otaku obsessions they can most forgive in a partner
Japanese women’s magazine’s list of traits for an ideal man is both understandable and baffling
Otaku Lovers: Japan’s new singles event that’s just for hardcore anime and video game fans
Why some otaku look at women’s breasts, according to Japanese Twitter
Majority of Japanese women in survey regret marrying their husband, but that’s only half the story
What are the most and least attractive hobbies for Japanese men and women? Survey investigates
Japanese women asked what best job for a husband is, may be looking for romantic-comedy lead
Five reasons nerds make great boyfriends: Japan’s geeky otaku list their pros
10 signs you might not be an otaku anymore