Help seek and destroy germs with these 20-second segments of metal classics.

To help teach proper hand washing methods during the COVID-19 pandemic, experts all over the world have been recommending singing “Happy Birthday” twice to ensure a thorough 20-second wash. This has been great because yesterday was my birthday, and quite frankly it has been the most attention I’ve ever gotten from my family about it.

However, now that my birthday is over, it’s getting old pretty quick. While “Happy Birthday” is definitely a good beginner tune due to its worldwide fame, we should all start venturing into our own favorite musical genres to shake things up a bit. And for metal heads, Osaka live music venue BigTwin Diner has some killer selections to hum or sing while shredding unwanted germs on your hands.

“A very easy-to-understand explanation, and just what I would expect from a live music club.”

Of course these songs are all well over 20 seconds (or well under in the case of one of the songs), but the Japanese instructions explain in detail how they can be used:

“20-Second Hand Washing!!

If “Happy Birthday,” sing twice.

If Metallica’s “One,” go until the lead guitar comes in on the arpeggio.”

In layperson’s terms, it’s just this part at the very beginning: Dun-na-nana, Dun-na-nana, Dun-na-nana, Dun-na-nana-neh, Dun-na-nana, Dun-na-nana, Dun-na-nana, Dun-na Dun-na Naaaa

“If Slayer’s “Angel of Death,” go until Tom Araya starts screaming.”

Dun-nanananana-na-un, Dun-nanananana-nah-un, Dun-nanananana-nananaNAH-un (4x)

If Megadeth’s “Tornado of Souls,” go until the drums begin the main rhtyhm.

This one’s tricky:

DUN un un un un, un Woo un Woo, DUN un DUN un, un un un un, un Woo un Woo, DUN un DUN un, un un un un, un Woo un Woo, DUN un DUN un, un un un un, un Woo un Woo, un Dun doodle-oodle-ooh-ooh nah nah nana-nee-nah, doodle-oodle-ooh-ooh nah nah nana-na-nah, doodle-oodle-ooh-ooh nah nah nana-nah-nahhh, nahhhh nahhh doodlee-oodlee-oodlee oohhhh…

If Napalm Death’s “You Suffer,” it’s barely a second long, so sing it 20 times.

You suffer, but why? (20x and sung so fast it sounds like “Brrrat!”)

I probably don’t recommend the Napalm Death one in public, since you’ll probably sound like a COVID-19 sufferer while singing it and freak everyone out. Nevertheless, many users online applauded the recommendations and a few had some of their own.

“If you sing ‘Ultra Soul’ by B’z from the ‘Yume janai’ part to the ‘ULTRA SOUL’ part, it’s 20 seconds!”
“That list is for old people.”
“The intro A to Motley Crue’s ‘Kickstart My Heart’ until Tommy Lee starts the rhythm drums is exactly 20 seconds.”
“Oh! Do Anthrax next please!”

My own personal recommendation would be “Short Songs” by Dead Kennedys. It’s more punk than metal, but it’s plenty catchy. However, this one’s also not recommended in public because without the musical accompaniment you’ll probably just sound like a maniac.

This poster has been one effort by BigTwin Diner, and other venues like it, to maintain a safe environment during an 80 percent drop in attendance. Although clubs like this are still open around Japan for the time being, ones in Osaka have been especially stigmatized after an outbreak was traced back to one earlier this month.

While staying away from such places is unfortunately the best course of action for the time being, it’s important to remember the artists and businesses which support them that are being hit hard by the pandemic. So be sure to buy some merchandise like a FamilyMart receipt shirt for now, and head out to the clubs as soon as things return to normal.

After all, they are the people keeping us safe with all these great hand washing songs.

Source: Twitter/@morisuke_696, J-Town Net
Featured image: Twitter/@morisuke_696
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