Mr. Sato tries to get ladies by transforming into a creepy version of L’Arc-en-Ciel’s Hyde

If you’ve been reading RocketNews24 for a while, you’ve probably come across the name Mr. Sato. If not, let us explain. Mr. Sato is a hilarious reporter for our Japanese sister site. But he’s so much more than just a writer; Mr. Sato is a teacher, a foodie and is also very patient.

One thing Mr. Sato is not, however, is married.

At roughly 40 years old, Mr. Sato wants to be impressing the ladies, so he’s tried time and again to transform himself to look like different famous people. But so far, nothing has worked. He has a new model in mind, though, that he thinks is fail-safe…

Over the past few years, Mr. Sato has tried to become a variety of characters and famous people in attempt to woo the ladies, yet he remains single and alone. Poor Mr. Sato! Before jumping into his latest endeavor, let’s review his past attempts and their shortcomings.

Mr. Sato as a young David Bowie:

“Although he was cool looking, Japanese women aren’t really into foreign guys.” (Really? We beg to differ.) Plus, he was too old for the part.

Mr. Sato as Daisuke Tsuda:

Daisuke Tsuda is an IT and music journalist, who is not really known for being an ikemen (handsome, cool guy). So, while he may have pulled the transformation off, there’s no reason women would be any more attracted to him.

Mr. Sato as Funasshi:

Funasshi is the loveably crazy, pear-shaped mascot character who took Japan by storm after winning the top mascot prize in the national mascot Grand Prix. Unfortunately, humanoid-Funasshi looked pretty creepy and probably would have been arrested if spotted by authorities.

Mr. Sato as Kyosuke Himuro:

Finally, a good-looking Japanese man to model himself after: singer-songwriter Kyosuke Himuro. The biggest downfall here, though, is that Himuro is more popular with men than with women, so again, Mr. Sato did not do himself any favors here. And again, he’s is just a bit too old to pull it off.

Now that you’ve seen his past of unfortunate decisions, we bring you his best idea yet: rock band L’Arc~en~Ciel’s frontman, Hyde. To (almost) justify his decision, Hyde was ranked the 9th most handsome man (in the opinion of Japanese men). They are also similar height and Mr. Sato is a touch younger than Hyde. With this in mind, Mr. Sato seems to think that:

“If I turn into Hyde, my attractiveness will go up so high that I’ll have to ask Prime Minister Abe to introduce polygamy into Japanese law.”

Mr. Sato is a big fan of L’Arc~en~Ciel, so he chose an image of Hyde from the “Winter Fall” music video (after singing it at karaoke) and bought some clothes to match. That was the easy part, the real transformation began at the hair and make-up salon.

▼ At the salon Mr. Sato requested to be made into Hyde. The staff was a bit taken aback, but did their best to satisfy.

▼ It’s not all about the hair, the face has to be just as pasty looking as Hyde’s.

Halfway through we got a sneak peek into his transformation and he does not look anything like Hyde. You can definitely tell that the makeup was professionally done, but the difference in attractiveness between Hyde and Mr. Sato is just overwhelmingly evident.

▼ He does look a lot different though…

Upon completion, however, Mr. Sato was quite pleased:

“Don’t I look just like Hyde?! If I walked in Shinjuku like this, people would swarm around me and I would have to take a taxi home.”

▼ Don’t worry, there is a plethora of more photos below.

What do you think? Is the 5th time a charm and Mr. Sato will find a darling now that he looks “exactly like Hyde”? When judging the photos, remember that our dear Mr. Sato is a sad, lonely man, so don’t judge too harshly.

▼ The complete look.

▼”Come and get me, ladies!”

▼ Kind of creepy.

▼ Where’s the swarm, Mr. Sato?

▼ No comment.

▼ He almost looks like an escaped mental hospital patient.

▼”Bye. ladies. You know where to find me.”

[ Read in Japanese ]

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