The literal and proverbial s#&t has hit the fan for one pair of boys.

As the tired saying goes: Boys will be boys. But the operative word there is “boys” which would imply a certain youthful indiscretion reserved for preteens at the latest.

For example, if an eight-year-old boy tosses wet toilet paper at someone, smacking said boy in the face might seem excessive. However, if the tosser were an 18-year-old, a lot more people would agree that it’s a justifiable clobberin’ time.

Speaking of 18-year-olds, last December in Nagoya’s Higashi Ward, two boys, ages 18 and 19, entered an apartment building and went to its roof. Once there one of the boys fired up their camera while the other whipped down his pants, positioned his butt over the ledge, and proceeded to use the world as his personal toilet.

They then maturely decided to post the video, which clearly shows one boy’s face, on the Internet. Soon after it was reported to police who formally charged them in March of this year.

https://twitter.com/yorozya_1/status/1110842047131320320

According to authorities, the two admitted to the charges of trespassing since neither lived in the building they pooped off. It’s unclear why no fecal charges were pressed in the name of vandalism, littering, reckless endangerment, or all of the above.

In news reports the face and bowel evacuation were censored but they can both be seen in the original video which has been largely taken down but still floats around corners of the Internet. In it we can clearly see that the lad’s dump had a medium consistency that must have resulted in a difficult cleanup.

▼ Tragically, poo that reforms itself into neat little coils can only be found at the 100-yen shop

According to the interrogation, the pair went to the roof to throw around cards – you know, like little ninjas – when one was struck with a sudden urge to defecate. It was then and there that an Internet star was born, and subsequently arrested.

Netizens were understandably outraged by such behavior and were especially disappointed that it was done by people so old.

“Too bad he didn’t fall off.”
“This behavior is like a sickness and they should be isolated to prevent it from spreading.”
“This is like something a three-year-old would do.”
“They should also pay for the cleanup.”
“Of all the pieces of shit seen in that video, those guys were the biggest.”
“And these young men will be of voting age soon.”
“They should reveal their names to really make an example of them.”
“They wanted to chuck around cards? Are these guys in kindergarten?”

It’s hard to disagree, but what everyone seems to be overlooking is that the boys didn’t live in that building and thus had no access to toilet paper. And as I sadly know all too well, his movement was rather moist, meaning there is likely to have been substantial remnants.

Did he stay there on the roof and carry on pretending to be Gambit from the X-Men with crustifying poopy pants? Common sense would dictate that he immediately go home and clean up, but nothing so far suggests that he possessed any common sense.

We should also consider the hardest hit victim of this incident: the fine city of Nagoya. It’s reputation has been struggling in recent years and we would like to point out that poo attacks are absolutely not an everyday occurrence there.

They only happen there about once every three years.

Sources: FNN Prime, My Game News Flash
Images: SoraNews24
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