Revenge is a dish best served with a side of onions.

Breaking up is never easy no matter what side of the let-down you’re on. It’s a painful experience that if handled incorrectly could result in a violently emotional scene, or in some cases 1,000 kilograms (2,200 lbs) of onions delivered to your doorstep.

This classic tale of “boy meets girl, boy dumps girl, girl orders truckload of vegetables” played out once again in Shandong Province, China. In this case the man, who wished not to be identified, did make the seemingly tactless move of ending the relationship only days before Valentine’s Day according to some reports. It was timing that would come back to haunt him a few months later.

The date 20 May has become a hip new version of Valentine’s Day in China due to it’s numbers, 5-2-0 sounding similar to “I love you” in Mandarin. And it was around this time that the man’s ex-girlfriend, identified as Ms. Zhao in the media, chose to exact her revenge.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k45TCDpSAo4

On the morning of 16 May, a truck full of onions weighing one metric ton drove up to the ex-boyfriend’s apartment block. On top of the pile of savory bulbs left in front of his door was a note from Ms. Zhao which read, “I cried for three days. Now it’s your turn.”

Now poetically it makes perfect sense, but I wonder about the effectiveness of sending a large amount of long-lasting and delicious food as an act of revenge. I have to admit that I’m getting a little jealous of this guy, imaging the months of non-stop onion rings and flavor-enhanced omelettes and burgers ahead.

▼ Then again, we here at SoraNews24 do have unique tastes

We can only assume Ms. Zhao didn’t opt for something more vile and eye-watering, like a tonne of ripe manure, out of consideration for onion boy’s neighbors. However, her restraint hadn’t worked in the end, as one tenant in the building told Shandong Net: “I don’t know if he’s crying, but I definitely am! This whole building reeks.”

The full delivery is said to have taken one person about four hours to complete, but at least the driver got paid and these days there’s far worse ways to make a yuan. Apparently it was no skin off Ms. Zhao’s back either, as she explained to media: “I got money.”

Onion boy explained to reporters that part of the reason he broke up with Ms. Zhao was her “over-the-top” and “dramatic” behavior. “She’s telling everyone that I haven’t shed one tear since our break-up,” he said, “Am I a bad person just because I didn’t cry?”

Good question! Let’s see what Japanese netizens thing about all this.

“I hope this didn’t trigger an onion shortage.”
“I wonder if that guy needs any dinner guests….”
“Isn’t the point of crying to let out your emotions so that you don’t lash out at people like that?”
“This story stinks!”
“I mean, you can even just microwave onions and they turn out great.”
“If those onions start to go bad, it’ll be a whole other ball game.”
“That would probably start to attract cockroaches, so he better eat them fast.”
“I’d just share them with all my neighbors and become a local hero.”

It would certainly appear that most people were too occupied with the spectacle of suddenly getting a tonne of onions to care about who was justified in this breakup, which is nice in a way. Hopefully, this effect has washed over Ms. Zhao and her now-pungent ex too, and they can both move on to meet new people, whose neighborhoods they can torment in the name of love.

Source: AFPBB, Hachima Kiko
Top image: Pakutaso
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