Adorable weapon choice was not the only misstep by this would-be bandit.

In the murky predawn hours of 31 August on the mean streets of Shinjuku, Tokyo, a young man working the graveyard shift at a Family Mart convenience store heard the familiar chime of the doors opening. However, this was no customer calling at 4:10 in the morning — it was a robber.

Reaching into his pocket, the crook pulled out a pair of nose hair trimmers with a three-centimeter (one-inch) blade that glistened menacingly under the fluorescent lights. With a cold gaze, the middle-aged robber demanded to the clerk, “Don’t move, get out the money.”

This presented a dilemma for the 25-year-old worker: If he got out the money, he would be breaking the “don’t move” command. On the other hand, if he stopped moving, there would be no way for him to take out the cash.

The threat of the tiny scissors and their rounded tips combined with his assailant’s unmeetable demands must have been too much for the clerk, so he simply ran away. This now left the robber in a predicament. With no clerk, he would not be able to get any money out of the register or safe. The take-a-yen-leave-a-yen tray offered little consolation.

▼ You can see the terrifying weapon in this news clip.

The confusion among both parties luckily managed to eat up enough time that an officer on patrol could be alerted to the crime in progress and rushed over to the scene to make the arrest. The suspect in custody was described as 49-years-old with no job or fixed address, but probably nicely groomed.

Residents of Tokyo were probably used to this kind of savage crime taking place, but those from elsewhere in Japan expressed their terror online. Bear in mind that some people have strange ways of expressing fear.

“Nose hair trimmers? Hahahahahahaha.”
“What a disgusting crime.”
“It’s a miracle the arresting officer was unharmed.”
“It’s like he was starting a PUBG game on expert mode.”
“A pencil would have worked better.”

“Maybe he was saying ‘don’t move’ so he could trim the clerks nose hairs. Then naturally he would request payment for the service.”

Surely the shocking nature of this crime will continue to ripple through society as people try to wrap their heads around it. I suppose the important lesson to learn is to always keep your nose hair trimmers in a secure location so they don’t get misused by criminal elements. Remember, cutting your nose hair is a privilege, not a right!

Source: Kyoto Shimbun, Hachima Kiko
Top image: SoraNews24