You are already drunk.

If you were going to compare anime series to drinks, Pokémon is a glass of fruit punch, sweet and fun, especially for little tykes. Dragon Ball Z is, of course, a canned energy drink, full of kinetic excitement that maybe should be taken down a notch every now and again.

And Fist of the North Star? Whisky, without question.

No other anime franchise in history is so unabashedly steeped in old-school machismo. When Fist of the North Star’s massively muscled heroes and villains aren’t punching each other until one of them explodes, they spend much of their time stoically pondering what it means to live life by your own rules, or looking back with bittersweet respect at adversaries with whom their iron wills clashed. So if you’re seeking the perfect liquid accompaniment for such musings, you’ll be happy to know that you can now buy official Fist of the North Star whisky, offered by Japanese online marketplace Whisky Mew.

Two single-malt varieties are on offer, both distilled in Scotland. First up is the Kenshiro version, featuring Fist of the North Star’s protagonist on a bottle of Highland-region Teaninich 20-year-old whisky.

Whisky Mew says the aroma of this 47.1-percent alcohol distillation is refreshing and lively, with notes of nutty cinnamon, grapefruit, and green banana. Sipping it reveals a complex flavor profile with elements of citrus, nuts, and sweet red beans leading to a pleasantly astringent finish. Whisky Mew recommends cutting it with water if you’d like to make it even smoother, and says it’s also suitable for mixing a highball, one of Japan’s favorite cocktails.

On the other hand, if your allegiance lies with Fist of the North Star’s charismatic tyrant Raoh, the emperor graces a bottle of Speyside Glentauchers whisky. The scent is one of herbs, lemon grass, sweet banana chips, and plum wine, while the taste is spicy and malty. Once again, Whisky Mew says mixing it with water will make it smoother, but will also bring out even more of the spice in this 51.8-percent 22-year-old whisky.

Only 240 700-mililiter (23.7-ounce) bottles of the Kenshiro Teaninich are being offered, while the identically sized Raoh Glentauchers is even scarcer, with just 193 bottles. Kenshiro will set you back 19,000 yen (US$179), while Raoh’s lower quantity commands a higher price of 22,000 yen. Both can be ordered here through Whisky Mew’s online store, and would make for an interesting tasting comparison with the Final Fantasy whisky.

Source: Whisky Mew via Japaaan
Top image: Whisky Mew
Insert images: Whiskey Mew
● Want to hear about SoraNews24’s latest articles as soon as they’re published? Follow us on Facebook and Twitter!

Follow Casey on Twitter, where he’s always loved how that character in the Fist of the North Star movie’s English dub says “You think I believe i magic or something?” just two minutes after he literally turns his body to steel.