What if the Terminator appeared in Daiso?

Some of the luckiest breaks in action-movie history are how in the Terminator franchise, the time-traveling freedom fighters and killing machines always end up appearing near a truck stop, biker bar, or some other location where they can find/steal suitable tough guy attire with which to cover their nakedness.

But what if the Terminator didn’t appear in Los Angeles, but in Tokyo? And what if he wasn’t going to steal his clothes, but buy them at 100 yen store chain Daiso?

That’s the question our Japanese-language reporter Go Hatori asked himself, and to find the answer, he challenged himself to put together an entire outfit only with Daiso items.

▼ Cue “Terminator theme”

Obviously, the first thing the Terminator would need to do is find something to cover his dong, because, as we know from first-hand experience, the Tokyo metro cops don’t take kindly to indecent exposure. Getting picked up for questioning could prevent the T-Go000 from eliminating/protecting its target, so purchase number one is a pair of Daiso boxer briefs.

They’re unusually long (this is a medium-size pair), but they do what they need to: conceal Go’s package. The next body parts that need coverage are the nipples, and here Go splurged on a premium-priced 700-yen Daiso dress shirt.

▼ Not every Daiso stocks them, but they’re pretty easy to find in larger branches.

This being Japan, where categorization is a key component of fashion, Go decided to add a few elements of upper-body flare, selecting a tie and pair of plastic sunglasses. He also found some socks which, with their “Golf” motif, appear to be targeted at older gentlemen, but sometimes giving your outfit a retro touch isn’t a bad idea.

Next, let’s cover up those legs. While Daiso doesn’t sell slacks or jeans, they do have “rain pants,” which are made out of a plastic poncho-like material.

To improve their fit, and also to make them feel a little dressier, Go paired these with a belt and suspenders. He also realized that he’d look downright weird wearing sunglasses indoors, so he decided to supplement them with a pair of non-prescription-lens fashion glasses.

At this point, Go had pretty much forgotten about his goal of becoming a Terminator, and became focused on simply looking his very best. Grabbing a pair of scissors and a roll of double-sided tape, he trimmed the thigh-length raincoat into a much shorter suit jacket (hey, if the material of the pants and jacket match, it’s a suit, right?) and taped back two creases to create lapels.

He also used a craft knife to slice open a breast pocket, so that he could fold and insert a Daiso handkerchief as a pocket square.

Finally, for the finishing touches, a pair of 150-yen slippers to serve as shoes…

…and a champagne flute and fabric rose, because as dapper as Go now looked, there was no way he wasn’t going to be invited to at least a half-dozen sophisticated holiday cocktail parties by the end of the day.

▼ “Wow, amazing!”

The total price tag for Go’s complete outfit? Just a little over 2,000 yen (US$18.50), proving that you really can buy just about everything you need at Daiso, which is good news for Go since we’re not giving him a one-million yen expense account anymore, after what happened last year.

Photos ©SoraNews24
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[ Read in Japanese ]