”Please believe me!” pleads little sister after possible death in the family, but you’ll want to stay on your guard.

Generally speaking, the appeal of Japan’s capsule toys is a mixture of cute, quirky, and comedic elements. Toss a few coins into the machine and you’ll get a Pokémon cosplay hood for your cat, mini rice cooker replica, or figure of someone drunk in public, Japanese-style.

But what if you’re not looking for a smile or a chuckle? What if you’re in the mood for terror?

Not a problem, thanks to the Letter From Your Little Sister capsule toy series.

We’ve talked about these before, and there’s a weirdness to the concept of paying for a letter that’s supposed to be addressed to you from your nonexistent, but feverishly loyal-to-her-big-brother, little sister. But the letter shown in the above photo from Japanese Twitter user @kyoryu_kuramo goes from creepy to concerning, as it reads:

“Dear Big Brother,

You must be surprised to suddenly get a letter from me. Actually, I’ve been keeping a secret from you.

Last year, Mom fell down the stairs, right? The truth is, I pushed her down them.

But it wasn’t on purpose! Please believe me!

A fly had landed on her back, and when I swatted it, I knocked her down.

I guess you must be shocked to have me confess to this in a letter, but it’s the truth.

Mom flew down the stairs with the speed of a fly.”

So a couple of questions spring to mind here. First, why is the little sister explaining the reason for the mom’s accident to her brother? Shouldn’t she be talking to her mom, who would then clue the rest of the family in?

The only conceivable answer is that the mom can’t hear her daughter’s explanation…because she’s dead.

But was this really an accident? A genuinely loving daughter wouldn’t cover this truth up for an entire year, and the letter has a definite “she doth protest too much” feel to it. Who tries to squish a fly when it’s still on someone’s back anyway? It’s not like it’s a mosquito, spider, or other potentially biting creepy crawly where time is of the absolute essence. Most suspicious of all: Why didn’t the police notice a squashed fly/bug guts on the mom’s back when they examined her?

Again, there’s only one possible explanation: This was no accident. It was a murder!

As for why Little Sister is writing to Big Brother now, it’s likely that some determined detective is getting closer to the truth, and the matricidal letter writer needs her sibling’s help as either a character witness or to help her go on the lamb. But don’t be deceived, Big Brother/capsule toy shopper. Little Sister is a cold, calculating killer (she even ends her revelation about Mom’s death with a cheesy pun), and if you’re not careful, you could be next.

Source: Twitter/@kyoryu_kuramo via Hachima Kiko
Top image: Pakutaso
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