“Don’t worry, he is a docile pervert” and other useful phrases in Japanese and English

Get ready to impress/terrify your Japanese friends!

Learning a foreign language can be tough. All the new grammar and vocabulary and verb conjugations are enough to fry anyone’s brain. Sometimes you just need to relax and learn some fun ways to use the language instead.

And one English vocabulary book does just that: “English Vocabulary Not on Any Test.” The book has been on sale in Japan for a couple of years now, but it was recently brought back to the attention of the online masses via Japanese Twitter user shunchan, who found it in his school’s library.

But if you’re reading this, then you’re probably already pretty good at English, so don’t worry—we’ll supply you with how to say the phrases in Japanese too. Purely for educational purposes, of course.

▼ The book’s cover, in all its glory, complete with a very useful phrase of its own. (Scroll down for transcriptions/translations.)

English: “Don’t worry, he is a docile pervert.”
Japanese: Daijoubu. Kare wa otonashii hentai da yo.

English: “Fantastic octopus wiring!”
“Thanks, I had a pro do it!”
Japanese: Suteki na tako ashi haisen!
Arigatou. Senmonka ni onegaishita no.

English: “Don’t whine just because someone shot you in the arm and chest with a machine gun.”
Japanese: Mashin gan de ude ya hara o utareta kurai de meso meso suru n ja nai.

English: “Boss, if there something wrong?”
“Bob, your Mobile Suit is on backwards.”
“Oops.”
Japanese: Kachou, dou ka saremashita?
Bobu, kimi no mobiru suutsu ushiro mae da yo.
Otto.

English: My brother has been pitching root crops ever since he received a heavy blow to the head.
Japanese: Otouto wa atama o kyouda shite kara zutto konsai o nagete imasu.

English: Bob laughed so hard that the salmon carpaccio came out of his nose.
Japanese: Bobu wa warai sugite saamon karupaccho ga hana kara demashita.

English: “What a nice barbed wire.”
“Thank you. I knitted it myself.”
Japanese: Suteki na yuushi tessen desu ne.
Arigatou. Jibun de anda n desu.

English: Miss Fukuda is the first financial planner to kill a brown bear with her bare hands.
Japanese: Fukuda san wa higuma o sude de shitometa, hajimete no fainansharu purannaa desu.

English: “I’m afraid to say this, but you are passed [sic] your best-before date.”
Japanese: Kyoushuku desu ga, anata no shoumi kigen wa kirete imasu yo.

English: “May I go home early? I’m feeling rather horny.”
Japanese: Muramura shite kita node soutai shitemo ii desu ka?

Out of all the phrases in the book, that one may just actually end up coming in handy someday….

If you want to see more incredibly useful English/Japanese phrases, then follow the book’s official Twitter account, where they post new ones regularly.

Or, if you really need the book itself as the ultimate coffee table conversation piece, then pick it up at Amazon Japan. Enriching your guests’ vocabulary with words like “root crop” and “octopus wiring” can never be a bad thing!

Source: Twitter/@U1Mx71qTN43oivc via Hamusoku
Images: Twitter (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

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