We all dream we could eat a dictionary’s weight in cheese in one serving, but what’s it like in practice? Worry not – we’re here to find out.

Here at SoraNews24 we have a healthy appreciation for cheese. In fact, some people might say that our reporters’ past history of custom-ordering a burger topped with 1,000 layers of processed cheese veers into the “dangerously unhealthy”, but to that we say: pah! Our arteries haven’t given in yet!

We have a particular glutton for punishment in our Japanese-language reporter Ahiru Neko. When he’s not getting sizzled with crepes or cruising hot springs for a date he’s filling his face with gigantic portions of greasy fast food. And upon hearing of Domino’s Pizza Japan‘s plan to up their cheese game with the New Yorker 1kg Ultra Cheese, he readied his guts and a gathered a handful of coworkers to tackle the cheesy challenge.

The New Yorker 1kg Ultra Cheese, which indeed is topped with one kilogram (2.2 pounds) of cheese, is only sold during a precious 13-day window: June 10 to June 23. It costs a handsome 4,000 yen (US$36.88), though you can save 700 yen by going to pick it up in person. 40 centimeters (15.7 inches) in diameter, and every last spot is drenched in a pillowy coating of cheese. This is the most cheese Domino’s Pizza Japan has ever put on a pizza at one time. History in the making.

When the pizza arrived at the office, the sheer size of the box had Ahiru Neko trembling in anticipation.

That’s right! Nothing but cheese, baby! Enough cheese to satisfy even our reporter’s dairy cravings! Cheese, glorious cheese! What some might call “too much cheese!” Ahiru Neko felt as though the world had shrunk to consist of just three things: his own consciousness, the pizza crust, and the ocean of cheese that lay atop it.

Upon reaching out and plucking out a choice slice for himself, Ahiru Neko noticed with wonder just how heavy it was. Could the crust even handle all the cheese stacked so lovingly on top of it?

As he lifted the slice aloft, another wondrous sight awaited him… Gooey cheese began to drip from the sides of the slice in delicious, stringy stalactites of mozzarella. Ultimately the crust gave in beneath the sheer might of all that cheese, and drooped majestically against his hand.

So much cheese… Ahiru Neko was starting to doubt this was a pizza at all, more of some unholy cheese deity that had descended down to earth in order to spread its creamy, delicious gospel. But he wouldn’t have to bear the gravity of this monstrous food item alone. Much like Frodo in Lord of the Rings, he had a team of pizza-bearers to lighten his load: a gaggle of SoraNews24 editors.

▼ “Is it really okay to eat this much cheese in one go?”

Ahiru Neko wants to give a word of warning here: if you’re at an amicable hang-out with a couple of friends and feel like ordering a pizza, tread carefully. Maybe one of you will suggest ordering “that cheesy one” they heard about. “Right,” agrees your other friend, “everyone’s talking about that one lately.” If you order it under such lax pretexts, the New Yorker 1kg Ultra Cheese is likely to be listed as your cause of death in an autopsy report. You must respect this volume of cheese, like you would respect poisonous blowfish in your sushi, or a starved mountain lion.

But if you feel up to taking on the ultimate challenge between human and pizza, then the New Yorker 1kg Ultra Cheese is an opportunity you won’t want to miss. History will surely record this glorious crime against nature alongside such gastronomic giants as the cheeseburger where the cheese is on the outside or yakisoba topped with chocolate sauce.

Images © SoraNews24
Related: Domino’s Pizza Japan – New Yorker 1kg Ultra Cheese
● Want to hear about SoraNews24’s latest articles as soon as they’re published? Follow us on Facebook and Twitter!
[ Read in Japanese ]