goukon
Meet singles and eat and drink as much as you like in a prime location right next to the Pacific. And all for free (if you’re a girl).
Japanese goukon (organized group dates) are a mixed bag – sometimes they’re a whole lot of fun, and other times they’re a downright uncomfortable experience. For Japanese women wanting to reduce their risk of having a terrible time, one magazine has put together a list of the top companies to avoid when it comes to lecherous guys at their drinking parties.
Japanese society is, by many measures, on the shy side when it comes to love. Full-grown adults often keep having a boyfriend or girlfriend a secret because they’re afraid of being teased or questioned about marriage, and if you see someone dressed up nicely carrying a bouquet of flowers, they’re far more likely to be going to a farewell party for a coworker than a date with a special someone.
However, there is one way in which Japan is refreshingly upfront with its romantic ambitions: the singles’ party known as a gokon. Literally meaning “matching party,” at a gokon you get an equal number of unattached men and women together, usually at a restaurant with plenty of alcoholic drinks, and see if there are any compatible pairs in the group.
As a guy, the combination of booze and girls seems like an ideal situation. But the flip side is that you’re also being judged by a panel of the opposite sex, so there are some serious pitfalls to look out for, and women in their 20s and 30s were recently polled as to the surest ways a guy can blow his chances at one of these parties.
Although the recent otaku marriage hunting party showed good results, millions of nerds still have to struggle with more conventional dating methods. Feeling ill-equipped in the social graces, these poor souls further entrench themselves in their obsessions lessening the chances of hooking up even more.
Luckily to the rescue comes Who’s Afraid of the Goukon? the latest book by Yoshi. This book is intended for mainly for otaku nerdy types but could be used by anyone feeling too socially awkward to take part in the Japanese group blind dates known as goukon.
Heavily-illustrated with manga examples, this how-to guide depicts the entire goukon culture assuming the reader knows absolutely nothing about them and provides hints as well as dispelling common misconceptions about these outings.
So you’re a middle aged person living in Japan with a mind to tie the knot but can’t seem to find that perfect match. You went to a goukon and followed all the rules but still couldn’t land that potential spouse.
It could be because you’re a geek. Now, that’s not as bad as it sounds. Statistics that I just pulled out of thin air suggest that up to 31% of us carry the otaku gene. Some of our best and brightest are nerds, such as Mark Zuckerberg, Weird Al Yankovic, and Wayne Gretzky.
However, for the otaku, marriage can be as hard to complete as that level in Battletoads where you have ride the hover bike. This is why the town of Washimiya has set up the Otaku Marriage Hunting Masquerade Ball.
In Japan, goukon, are mixers meant to set the stage for finding a mate. They are designed to help young adults find at least a relationship, if not a suitable marriage partner, and are often organized by businesses like in the ad above.
The average goukon brings together around three to five people of each gender and takes place at a restaurant or izakaya (Japanese-style bar). Groups are seated randomly, usually with seats alternating by gender so everyone can get to know each other better.
Business organizational skills aside, most women know that the chance of a relationship forming from a goukon depends on the efforts of the participants. A certain protocol must be followed if a man wants a woman to give him the time of day. If he is too out-of-place, then it could cause embarrassment all around.
Japanese website Otome Sugoren surveyed their female readers to find out what kind of guy they think shouldn’t even bother showing up to the goukon party. Men: be sure to pay attention so you know what not to do at your next goukon. After all, while you may be there to play the field, women are serious about finding someone! Read More