
Seme’s confession of passion turns out to be too hot for the equipment to handle.
In any gym, you’ll see people exercising with earphones in their ears. While you obviously can’t hear what they’re listening too, it’s pretty easy to imagine everyone has some sort of energizing soundtrack for their workout, whether it’s an up-tempo power-pop number, swaggering hip-hop track, or the theme from Rocky.
But all those guesses would be wrong in the case of one fujoshi friend of the wife of Japanese Twitter user @jojohideo1975. Instead, the friend, who we’ll call Miss F, headed to the gym with a boys’ love drama CD, featuring a steamy tale on male-on-male romance.
嫁の腐友から聞いた話。ジムで心拍数計れるエアロバイク的なものをやりながらBLドラマCDを聞いていたところ攻めが受けに突然の告白。心拍数がありえない数値になったマシンが警報音を鳴らし従業員が駆けつける大ごとに。その場はやり過ごすも後日行くとそのマシンには故障中の張り紙が貼ってあったそう
— 城定秀夫 (@jojohideo1975) May 15, 2020
As @jojohideo1975 recounts, Miss F showed up at the gym and grabbed an open exercise bike (which are called “aero bikes” in Japanese) and started pedaling to the sounds of steamy, breathy voice actors. As with any proper boys’ love tale, this one included a seme (the “attacker” or “top”) and an uke (“receiver”/”bottom”), and during her ride Miss F got to the part where the seme startlingly confesses his love to the object of his affection.
The unexpected turn of events filled Miss F with excitement…actually a little too much excitement. See, the exercise bike she was using had a device to measure the user’s heart rate, and when combined with her already elevated rate from the workout, the extra exhilaration of the seme’s declaration sent Miss F’s heart rate soaring to apparently dangerous levels. A warning alarm suddenly blared out of the bike’s speaker, and employees quickly came rushing over to see if she needed medical assistance.
Not wanting to divulge the details of the stimulating aural accompaniment for her fitness session (it was a drama CD from adult computer game Kichiku Megane, @jojohideo1975 reports), Miss F acted as innocently as she could. “How strange,” she told the gym staff. “There’s no way my heart rate could have gotten that high [from pedaling]. I wonder if there’s something wrong with the sensor?” On her next visit to the gym a few days later, an “under maintenance” notice had been taped to the bike, with the staff apparently still unable to find the source of what they mistakenly thought was a purely mechanical error.
The tale of sweaty passion brought online comments such as:
“It’s like the ‘aero bike’ became an ‘ero bike.’”
“The poor exercise bike. It did nothing wrong.”
“The excitement from Boys’ Love can kill you, so please exercise caution in regulating the amount you consume.”
“We should probably ban Boys’ Love consumption in gyms and hospitals, for safety reasons.”
Provided the sound isn’t leaking out so that others can hear it, you could make the argument that listening to a stimulating drama CD to help get your heart pumping is a clever workout trick. Just don’t overdo it, though, since an exercise bike that’s mistakenly treated as broken is one less piece of equipment for others to use, and make extra sure to wipe off the seat when you’re done.
Source: Twitter/@jojohideo1975 via Jin
Top image: Pakutaso
Insert images: Pakutaso
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