Trust us, this won’t end like our other get-rich-quick-schemes, because this time we’ve got supernatural powers on our side!

About a year ago, our boss, Yoshio, decided to turn 100,000 yen of paper money into 100,000 one-yen coins. Since then, we’ve been taking turns keeping him away from the company coffers, and this week it was our Japanese-language reporter Go Hatori’s turn to stand guard.

In retrospect, perhaps our trust in Go was misplaced.

While the rest of us were working, Go cryptically announced “There are times in this life when a man just has to take a shot.” Then he stood up and walked out of the office, so we followed him to see what he was up to.

There was a nervous yet excited energy to Go’s gait, and also to his grin, but more so than his feet or face, it was his hand that had our attention, since he was clutching an envelope. And not just any envelope: it was the telltale shade of green our bank uses for the envelopes it supplies next to its ATMs.

After walking for a few minutes, Go finally arrived at his destination: a booth selling lottery tickets.

We couldn’t hear what he was saying to the clerk, but it was obvious that Go had come to buy some tickets for the upcoming Lotto 6 drawing. No one hit the most recent jackpot, and with the carryover for Thursday’s drawing now up to 24,132,387 yen (US$213,560), a lot of people have been feeling the temptation to try their luck. But while Lotto 6 tickets are only 200 yen each, Go wasn’t paying with pocket change…

…but with a thick stack of 10,000-yen (US$88) bills!

The clerk carefully counted Go’s pile of cash, then asked what numbers he wanted. For the sake of efficiency, he decided to opt for quick-pick tickets, which randomly select six numbers between 1 and 43. After his tickets were processed and printed, we asked Go just how many he’d bought, to which he cheerfully replied…


In the interest of securing our company’s financial security, Go had decided to transform one million yen (US$8,850) into 5,000 Lotto 6 tickets. Beaming with pride at his bold financial initiative, he made his way back to SoraNews24 headquarters, clutching the paper bag full of potential riches to his chest.

Once back in the office, he wanted to show off his brilliant investment to his coworkers.

▼ It takes a heaping helping of craziness to startle Mr. Sato, but Go did it.

At this point, though, Go realized his work wasn’t done. With the tickets stacked up in neat little bundles, he won’t be able to check them against the winning numbers when they’re announced.

So he began spreading the tickets out, one by one…

…until they covered an entire corner of our office.

At the risk of spoiling his good spirits, we took this opportunity to remind Go that we bought a million yen worth of lottery tickets two years ago, an endeavor that ended with us down 634,800 yen. Wasn’t he just setting us up to finish in the red again?

“No way!” he assured us. “I’ve got it all taken care of. Check THIS out!”

“See? I took a pen, and totally strengthened the money line on my palm! There’s no way we can lose. Come Thursday, we’ll all be rich! Filthy stinking rich!!!

Will Go’s manipulation of supernatural forces be our ticket to the lap of luxury? Or has he doomed our staff to a life of subsisting on 100-yen Japanese convenience store pasta? Check back soon for the thrilling, and possibly idiotic, conclusion!

Photos ©SoraNews24
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