Just follow Uncle Pizza’s easy recipe to find out!

By now you have all probably rushed out and bought the ingredients to make your own ramen pizza after reading our easy-to-follow recipe. And surely everyone loved this fusion, but might be surprised to learn that it was the concept of SoraNews24’s own pizza fanatic Seiji Nakazawa!

Seiji loves pizza with a passion unlike few we’ve ever seen, but ever since he’s gotten into pizza-making that passion has hit worrisome levels. For example, ever since the ramen pizza he insists on speaking in broken Italian, having us call him “Uncle Pizza,” and wearing a 100-yen store fake mustache.

▼ “Buongiorno! Salve! Plácido Domingo!”

Uncle Pizza tells us he’s a leading “pizzapiology expert” and is constantly in search of the true limits of this globally loved and versatile food.

Normally, we’d discourage this kind of delusional behavior, but we kind of like that Uncle Pizza comes into work wearing a nicely pressed dress shirt rather than Seiji’s usual wrinkled alternative rock T-shirts.

Uncle Pizza also said that his next experiment involved the hugely popular Japanese chip brand Pizza Potato, highly regarded for their thick cut and extremely deep pizza taste. This gem of the junk food scene led Uncle Pizza to postulate: If one were to make a pizza from Pizza Potato, then it logically would become the most pizza pizza ever!

Wasting no time, Uncle Pizza prepared some pizza dough and blended in pieces of Pizza Potato. However, disaster struck.

Although, it looked pretty good, the Pizza Potato compromised the structural integrity of the dough making it brittle, weak, and impossible to pick up.

Clearly, Uncle Pizza had made a fatal mistake by wasting no time to try his first idea, so he decided to instead do nothing for about a week and just let the concept incubate in his brilliant mind for a while. However, even then, nothing came to him.

As he stared at the bag of flour he began to regret the whole idea. “Mucca arancione, this is impossible,” he lamented, “Why’a couldn’t I have been ‘Uncle Pasta’ instead?”

Suddenly an idea-full light bulb hit his eye like a big pizza pie and Uncle Pizza shouted, “Pasta! That’s it!”

Rather than simply, forcing the chips into the pizza dough, he would first make a pasta (“paste”) out of it.
Uncle Pizza rushed into the kitchen and after minutes of pans clanging and timers dinging, he emerged victorious, and now, Uncle Pizza would like to share his groundbreaking recipe with us all.

Pizza Potato Pizza

Ingredients

  • Pizza Potato chips
  • Pizza sauce
  • Shredded cheese
  • Green Peppers
  • Flour (Uncle Pizza used rice flour, but wheat is probably OK too)

Step 1
Crush the chips into little pieces.

Step 2
Pour in 120 millilitres (4 ounces) of water.

Step 3
Heat in a microwave for about two minutes, till it’s warm and gooey.

▼ “Like a nice cacca di cane fumante!”

Step 4
Mush up all the little pieces of chips.

▼ “Do it until they’re unrecogniza-bella!”

Step 5
Add a cup of flour.

Step 6
Knead and put in a little more water, about 20 millilitres (0.7 ounces).

Step 7
Knead some more.

Step 8
Stretch the dough onto a board that’s been lightly covered in flour.

▼ “Make it flat like like a nice tappetino da bagno, eh.”

Step 9
Add your favorite pizza toppings.

▼ “I like to start with some disgustosa salsa di pomodoro imitazione, ahhh yes.”

▼ “Then, of course, some nice “formaggio” fortemente trattato chimicamente…”

▼ “Finally, some sliced pepe verde… Ah! Cerchio!”

Step 10
Put your Pizza Potato Pizza into an oven for 15 minutes. Uncle Pizza never told us at what temperature  though…

“Scoprilo tu stesso.”

When the timer goes off, it’s Pizza Potato Pizza time!

“Adeguata!!!”

Uncle Pizza dove into his Pizza Potato Pizza like a true pizza aficionado would. Thanks to the well-blended chips, the crust had a tender starchiness to it, like a fluffy cloud of mashed potatoes.

Since, potatoes are no stranger to sauce and cheese, the flavors were a marvelous blend.

There was no denying that this was an ingenious and delicious snack, and considering how it turned out, Uncle Pizza couldn’t have been more disappointed in it. While delicious, the “pizza” flavor of the Pizza Potato failed to translate, possibly because it got watered down in the mashing process. This meant that the Pizza Potato Pizza did not ultimately usher in any new level of pizza as far as Uncle Pizza was concerned.

Far from giving up, however, Uncle Pizza will continue in his mission to explore uncharted pizza territory to seek out new pizza life and new pizza civilizations. To boldly go where no pizzapiologist has gone before.

Photos ©SoraNews24
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