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Master Blaster

Writer / Translator

Master Blaster is the two-man translating team of Canada’s Steven Le Blanc and Japan’s Masami M, a pair who in addition to writing work are in English education and created the StudyNow app for Japanese students of English.

Together they have written somewhere around 1,500 articles for RocketNews24 covering such diverse topics as Chinese men selling sanitary napkins to each other and a Japanese guy dragging an ear of corn around the Tokyo train system. A few of these were actually good, but don’t take our word for it! Here’s what our beloved readers had to say:

“One isn't always in the mood for bold tastes. But when I'm in the mood for bold flavor I turn to you.”
“Stupid article. Who cares what the Japanese think it's cool. You don't call a monkey, "gorilla".”
“You know, this is about the most cogent explanation of how a turbocharger works that I have ever seen in the non-motorsports world.”
“Thanks for the article peter!”
“It's people like you who make exploitation possible.”
“It looks yummy and the story was great. Thank you for the smile.”

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Posted by Master Blaster (Page 137)

New traditional rice topping selling well, but at 10,000 yen a pop it doesn’t take much

Master Blaster
Jun 1, 2014
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Toppings and seasonings have an often overlooked power to completely make or break the overall taste of a dish. And yet, many of them can be found at prices under 100 yen (US$1). Why is something so important to your meal’s flavor made and sold so cheaply?

Back in 2013 Kobayashi Shokuin, decided to buck that trend and came out with a luxury furikake (dried condiment) that sells for the premium price of two 30g (1oz) cans for 10,000 yen ($100). Much to their delight, the response has been great and people have been buying up this Kuchi Doke at an increasing rate despite its exorbitant price.

Just in time for summer, Asahi to begin selling Mitsuya Cider served at a slushy -5℃

Master Blaster
Jun 1, 2014

Hot on the heels of an announcement that cold and sugary foods are bad for your body, Asahi announced that they are releasing their coldest sugary drink to date. I’m willing to take the risk however, because summer in Japan can suck pretty hard and a sub-zero beverage would definitely hit the spot.

This new drink called “Mitsuya Freezing Cider,” turns to ice the moment you pop the cap. Sounds great but Asahi seems to have surprised netizens a little with their unique distribution plans.

Gunpowder factory building damaged by “normal explosion”

Master Blaster
May 31, 2014

A building at a factory in Hunan Province, China that produces gunpowder for use in fireworks was obliterated following an explosion that rocked a neighboring community on the morning of May 28. The plant’s management issued a statement saying, “It was completely destroyed so we don’t know the cause. However, it was a normal explosion.” It’s hard to argue with the managers in a gunpowder factory – certainly that would be the most normal place to have an explosion.

Saitama soccer fans employ Art of War strategy to make up for low turnout

Master Blaster
May 30, 2014

It’s well known that a large crowd (or lack thereof) can have a dramatic psychological impact on a team’s performance. Unfortunately for Saitama’s soccer team, Omiya Ardija, it was hard for fans to get out to the ground to cheer during the Wednesday night J-League Cup qualification match against the Tokushima Vortis.

Nevertheless, those who managed to make it to the stadium went the extra mile to get their team pumped for a win, taking along an army of two-dimensional fans to fill seats.

Chinese Air Force chasing UFO believed to have been caught on Google Maps

Master Blaster
May 30, 2014

Back in September 2011, there were widespread flight cancellations across China that were blamed on inclement weather. It was an unusually large disruption to the air traffic across a large country, so some took to the net to ask “What was really going on?” One theory that arose was that the nation’s airspace had been shut down because the People’s Liberation Army (PLA) Air Force was engaging UFOs.

Over time, however, the rumors subsided and became the stuff that urban legends are made of. Until now, that is, as a discovery on Google Map’s satellite images has turned up what appears to be two planes following a rapidly moving, blurry white object. It’s an image that many are theorizing to be that legendary close encounter.

“Sudden desire to eat ice cream may indicate cancer” – Author of book on the disease

Master Blaster
May 28, 2014

The other day I was craving one of those delectable Cream Puff Gari Gari Kun ice pops from my local 7-Eleven with their sweet milky ice crystals coating a rich custard sauce center. So you know what I did?

I went right down to my local hospital for a colonoscopy, that’s what. Normally I’d actually eat the delicious snack, but after hearing about the latest book by Japanese author, Munetetsu Tei, I learned that it might actually be cancer trying to trick me.

Japanese variety show stumbles into interview with a Grand Master of Freemasonry

Master Blaster
May 27, 2014

Around the world no other club has been the source of wild speculation and urban legends as Freemasonry. This is mostly due to the club’s secrecy on what exactly they do along with its illustrious membership including voice actor Mel Blanc, MLB pitcher Ty Cobb, and circus promoters the Ringling Brothers.

Although very little is known about the Freemasons, one Japanese comedy program, by a sheer stroke of luck, was able to infiltrate their Japanese Grand Lodge and speak with their newly inducted Grand Master.

Tokyo University’s amazing Rock-Paper-Scissors robot is back, will kick your ass faster than ever

Master Blaster
May 27, 2014

A couple of years ago we reported on a robot hand that could always win at the timeless hand game rock-paper-scissors or janken as it’s known here in Japan. After wrapping up, we confirmed that it would never lose, declared that the human race was doomed to sit in the back seats of our robot overlords, then called it a day.

Now we are surprised to learn that Tokyo University’s Ishikawa Watanabe Lab is back with an even better performing rock-paper-scissors robot, somewhat awkwardly dubbed the Janken Robot with 100% Winning Rate.

Russian crocodile hospitalized after woman falls on it

Master Blaster
May 27, 2014

It’s one of those tragic accidents that seems to replay itself far too often. Not a week goes by that I don’t open up the newspaper and hear yet again about how a crocodile has been injured by a woman not wearing her seatbelt.

Whelp, here we go again… On 20 May in Murmansk, Russia a two-meter-long crocodile named Fedya was treated for injures after a 120kg (265lbs) woman fell on it. This incident started off like they always do, with a minibus full of circus performers driving through the Arctic.

Tokyo University and NHK on the verge of touch-o-vision: Television you can truly feel a part of

Master Blaster
May 27, 2014

On 23 May, NHK announced that it has been working with Tokyo University to create a way to not only transmit images over long distances but to also send the sense of touch. Using this, viewers would also become able to actually feel whatever appeared on screen with their own hands.

This system makes use of Tokyo University’s newly developed device which can measure the dimensions and hardness of an object in three dimensions simultaneously. On the other end, NHK has been hard at work on a Touch/Force Display which would allow viewers to get tactile feedback from the images presented on screen.

Newsflash: AKB48 members attacked by saw-wielding “fan” at handshake event【UPDATED】

Master Blaster
May 25, 2014

At 4:55 p.m. today, the company behind many of Japan’s larger idol groups, AKS, released a statement regarding an attack on members of AKB48 and event staff during a handshake event in Iwate Prefecture this afternoon.

Members Rina Kawaei (19) and Anna Iriyama (18), as well as a male member of the venue staff, are said to have been injured, with a 24-year-old male taken into police custody.

Over 2,000 Saitama residents to get refunds from the police for “erroneously” issued tickets

Master Blaster
May 25, 2014

For those who woke up in Saitama Prefecture this morning, you might have noticed something particularly pleasant in the air, like the entire region just got a little happier. That’s because on 22 May the Prefectural Police announced that they would be giving refunds and apologies to 2,400 people who were given tickets and demerit points because of an improperly conducted eight-year crackdown on driving violations.

“The Man Who Was Slashed 50,000 Times” gets his first starring role in upcoming film

Master Blaster
May 23, 2014

Since the 1950s, Seizo Fukumoto has been a fixture of seemingly any Japanese production involving samurai. However, you probably wouldn’t recognize his face as he tends to be given the role of “guy who gets killed.” Although he has occasionally taken work outside of period pieces, his constant roles as “soon-to-be-dead guy #2” has earned him the industry title: The Man Who Was Slashed 50,000 Times.

Having enjoyed a long and bloody career in cinema slightly off center-stage, Fukumoto has finally been given his chance at a starring role in Uzumasa Limelight, a new film hitting Japanese theatres this summer.

Zhongshan man makes the catch of his life: a one-year-old child

Master Blaster
May 23, 2014

For those of you who thought phys-ed class never taught skills valuable in the real world, we bring you the story and footage of one Mr. Li of Zhongshan City, Guangdong.

Upon seeing an infant at a second-story window, the man dashed below and readied himself to make the most important catch of his life.

Woman falls down open manhole into excrement-filled drain, lives to tweet about it

Master Blaster
May 22, 2014

It’s a scenario that has played out in so many cartoons: You’re walking along the street, minding your own business when suddenly – ZOINK! – you’ve fallen into an uncovered manhole.

When it happens in the real life, though, like it did to this poor woman who documented the experience via Twitter, it’s a far more grisly scene.

As you might expect from a story involving personal injury and a trip to the sewers, this post contains images that some readers may prefer not to look at while enjoying their lunch.

Two boys beaten and robbed of puffy pants, Osaka slammed for being trapped in the past

Master Blaster
May 22, 2014

On 20 May, Osaka Prefectural Police announced the arrest of four boys ages 14 and 15 on charges of assault and robbery. The victims were two other male students caught in the act of “bontan hunting” which is ganging up on and attacking someone to steal their particular style of puffy pants.

In addition to this heinous crime, as news hit the internet the rest of Japan came down hard on Osaka for having teens who wear fashion and engage in activities that have been out of style for decades.

Driver’s licenses? More and more Japanese youths don’t need no stinkin’ licenses

Master Blaster
May 19, 2014

The times they are a changing again. Back in the day, young men would dream of getting a stylish ride in the hopes of raising their status and ultimately win the affections of the women around them.

However, now it seems that youngsters in Japan are no longer interested in paying large sums of money to strap themselves into large decorated pieces of metal and move around at high speeds with hundreds of other random strangers also piloting lethal projectiles.

Where did we go wrong?

Just when you thought it was safe to get your triglyceride levels checked, the Mega Mac returns

Master Blaster
May 19, 2014

It’s been seven hours and 473 days since they took your love away, Mega Mac. And now the McDonald’s Japan hit taste of the month in the form of an oversized Big Mac has returned. Starting 19 May McDonald’s outlets across the land will again begin serving up the Mega Mac to gluttonous fans (including half of our writing staff) left wanting more back in January ’13.

Nine celebrities who speak Japanese… or some variation of it

Master Blaster
May 18, 2014

It’s no surprise that in the field of entertainment many talented individuals have found work in Japan and many more have expressed an interest in Japanese culture. But beyond those who stop by Japan and utter a simple “oishi” in a beer commercial or create a music video wearing a cupcake skirt, are a select few who have learnt or are well on their way to learning the Japanese language. Here are a few of them representing the fields of film, sports, and music.

Husband gives wife a piece of his lung in a revolutionary transplant with the help of a 3-D printer

Master Blaster
May 17, 2014

After having difficulty breathing, a Kansai area resident went to the hospital where she learned that she had an irreversible case of pulmonary fibrosis (firming of lung tissue). The doctors told her that if she didn’t receive a transplant for her left lung she would die. Luckily, her own husband was found to be a suitable donor. However, although his blood and tissue matched, there was a problem with the size of his lung. So a team of doctors at Kyoto University came up with a creative solution so unheard of, you’re more likely to find it in the pages of Black Jack rather than a medical journal.