Master Blaster

Writer / Translator

Master Blaster is the two-man translating team of Canada’s Steven Le Blanc and Japan’s Masami M, a pair who in addition to writing work are in English education and created the StudyNow app for Japanese students of English.

Together they have written somewhere around 1,500 articles for RocketNews24 covering such diverse topics as Chinese men selling sanitary napkins to each other and a Japanese guy dragging an ear of corn around the Tokyo train system. A few of these were actually good, but don’t take our word for it! Here’s what our beloved readers had to say:

“One isn't always in the mood for bold tastes. But when I'm in the mood for bold flavor I turn to you.”
“Stupid article. Who cares what the Japanese think it's cool. You don't call a monkey, "gorilla".”
“You know, this is about the most cogent explanation of how a turbocharger works that I have ever seen in the non-motorsports world.”
“Thanks for the article peter!”
“It's people like you who make exploitation possible.”
“It looks yummy and the story was great. Thank you for the smile.”

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Posted by Master Blaster (Page 134)

Nation alerted to man asking where the nearest bathroom is

Whenever a suspicious person is reported to the police it gets up loaded to the Zenkoku no Anzen/Anshin Mail (National Safety/Security Mail) website accessible anywhere in Japan. However, every once in a while a “suspicious person” added seems suspiciously not suspicious.

Such is the case of a student who was approached by a middle-aged man and forced to go to the police after being asked “Where is a bathroom?”

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Coca-Cola giving away specialty bottlecaps in Vietnam to promote reusing their plastic bottles

You have to hand it to Coca-Cola. Despite being the best-selling cola brand and one of the biggest companies in the world, they certainly don’t seem to rest on their laurels. Like a hungry up-and-coming business, they’re always coming up with new gimmicks in each of the 200 countries they operate in, whether it be personalized bottles in Japan or, like now in Vietnam, a set of functional caps which can transform your empty bottle into a water gun, pencil sharpener, night lights and more after you’re finished with it.

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Toyota’s hydrogen fuel cell powered car ready for sale this December

Although the technology has been talked about for quite some time now, the concept of using oxygen and hydrogen to power an automobile seems poised to finally hit the market.

According to reports, the Toyota Motor Corporation has recently declared that their sedan-type Fuel Cell Vehicle (FCV) will begin production at the end of this year. At the moment Toyota claims this would make them the first automaker in the world to market such a vehicle to the public at large.

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Mr. Sato goes post-apocalyptic at Fist of the North Star event

Although now a man in his 40s, Mr. Sato has long held a special place in his heart for the Fist of the North Star series. He recalls picking up a copy of the manga 20 years ago and heading straight out to the gym for two sets of 18kg (40lbs) bench presses.

After two weeks of that, he felt he had reached his full potential, but was still nowhere near as cool as the series’ protagonist Kenshiro. Decades later came word of the Fist of North Star bi-weekly DVD collection beginning at Kinokuniya in Shinjuku. The first day of sale was to be rung in by a gathering of cosplay characters from the series. Mr. Sato’s mind raced at the possibility of truly becoming his long-time hero Kenshiro.

Just then Mr. Sato’s editor approached him saying, “Hey, you like North Star don’t you? How’d you like to go down there and cosplay as…”

“You’ve stood in my way long enough! I’m going to Shinjuku to become as awesome as Kenshiro is whether you like it or not!” shouted Mr. Sato snapping out of his daydream and crushing a paper cup in his mighty fist.

“Yeah, that’s what I was going to sa…”

Mr. Sato interjected, “You’re already dead.” He then flicked the paper cup at the editor’s forehead and walked determinedly out of the office without looking back.

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Fake Funasshi fails at function, foiled by fuzz for infringement

On June 1, a gathering was held to celebrate the 60th anniversary of the municipalization of Takasago City, Hyogo Prefecture. Dubbed the Gotoji Expo, it brought out those lovable civic-minded mascots called yuru-kyara.

And for such as auspicious anniversary the town called in a major mascot from each of the 47 prefectures of Japan such as the former Yurukyara Gran Prix winner Kumamon of Kumamoto Prefecture. An invitation was also sent out to Funasshi, the unofficial yet hugely popular mascot of Funabashi, but it had to decline because of scheduling issues.

So you can imagine the organizers’ surprise when the highly animated pear had actually turned up at Gotoji Expo?

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OC Desu: It’s what all the cool kids are typing nowadays

Did you have anything OC Desu (OCです) today?

If your answer is “Wha?” then you’re probably not hip to the new buzzword circling around social media in Japanese recently. Students of the language can probably figure it out by saying it out loud, and the image above gives us a pretty big hint too.
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New traditional rice topping selling well, but at 10,000 yen a pop it doesn’t take much

Toppings and seasonings have an often overlooked power to completely make or break the overall taste of a dish. And yet, many of them can be found at prices under 100 yen (US$1). Why is something so important to your meal’s flavor made and sold so cheaply?

Back in 2013 Kobayashi Shokuin, decided to buck that trend and came out with a luxury furikake (dried condiment) that sells for the premium price of two 30g (1oz) cans for 10,000 yen ($100). Much to their delight, the response has been great and people have been buying up this Kuchi Doke at an increasing rate despite its exorbitant price.

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Just in time for summer, Asahi to begin selling Mitsuya Cider served at a slushy -5℃

Hot on the heels of an announcement that cold and sugary foods are bad for your body, Asahi announced that they are releasing their coldest sugary drink to date. I’m willing to take the risk however, because summer in Japan can suck pretty hard and a sub-zero beverage would definitely hit the spot.

This new drink called “Mitsuya Freezing Cider,” turns to ice the moment you pop the cap. Sounds great but Asahi seems to have surprised netizens a little with their unique distribution plans.

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Gunpowder factory building damaged by “normal explosion”

A building at a factory in Hunan Province, China that produces gunpowder for use in fireworks was obliterated following an explosion that rocked a neighboring community on the morning of May 28. The plant’s management issued a statement saying, “It was completely destroyed so we don’t know the cause. However, it was a normal explosion.” It’s hard to argue with the managers in a gunpowder factory – certainly that would be the most normal place to have an explosion.

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Saitama soccer fans employ Art of War strategy to make up for low turnout

It’s well known that a large crowd (or lack thereof) can have a dramatic psychological impact on a team’s performance. Unfortunately for Saitama’s soccer team, Omiya Ardija, it was hard for fans to get out to the ground to cheer during the Wednesday night J-League Cup qualification match against the Tokushima Vortis.

Nevertheless, those who managed to make it to the stadium went the extra mile to get their team pumped for a win, taking along an army of two-dimensional fans to fill seats.

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Chinese Air Force chasing UFO believed to have been caught on Google Maps

Back in September 2011, there were widespread flight cancellations across China that were blamed on inclement weather. It was an unusually large disruption to the air traffic across a large country, so some took to the net to ask “What was really going on?” One theory that arose was that the nation’s airspace had been shut down because the People’s Liberation Army (PLA) Air Force was engaging UFOs.

Over time, however, the rumors subsided and became the stuff that urban legends are made of. Until now, that is, as a discovery on Google Map’s satellite images has turned up what appears to be two planes following a rapidly moving, blurry white object. It’s an image that many are theorizing to be that legendary close encounter.

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“Sudden desire to eat ice cream may indicate cancer” – Author of book on the disease

The other day I was craving one of those delectable Cream Puff Gari Gari Kun ice pops from my local 7-Eleven with their sweet milky ice crystals coating a rich custard sauce center. So you know what I did?

I went right down to my local hospital for a colonoscopy, that’s what. Normally I’d actually eat the delicious snack, but after hearing about the latest book by Japanese author, Munetetsu Tei, I learned that it might actually be cancer trying to trick me.

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Japanese variety show stumbles into interview with a Grand Master of Freemasonry

Around the world no other club has been the source of wild speculation and urban legends as Freemasonry. This is mostly due to the club’s secrecy on what exactly they do along with its illustrious membership including voice actor Mel Blanc, MLB pitcher Ty Cobb, and circus promoters the Ringling Brothers.

Although very little is known about the Freemasons, one Japanese comedy program, by a sheer stroke of luck, was able to infiltrate their Japanese Grand Lodge and speak with their newly inducted Grand Master.

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Tokyo University’s amazing Rock-Paper-Scissors robot is back, will kick your ass faster than ever

A couple of years ago we reported on a robot hand that could always win at the timeless hand game rock-paper-scissors or janken as it’s known here in Japan. After wrapping up, we confirmed that it would never lose, declared that the human race was doomed to sit in the back seats of our robot overlords, then called it a day.

Now we are surprised to learn that Tokyo University’s Ishikawa Watanabe Lab is back with an even better performing rock-paper-scissors robot, somewhat awkwardly dubbed the Janken Robot with 100% Winning Rate.

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Russian crocodile hospitalized after woman falls on it

It’s one of those tragic accidents that seems to replay itself far too often. Not a week goes by that I don’t open up the newspaper and hear yet again about how a crocodile has been injured by a woman not wearing her seatbelt.

Whelp, here we go again… On 20 May in Murmansk, Russia a two-meter-long crocodile named Fedya was treated for injures after a 120kg (265lbs) woman fell on it. This incident started off like they always do, with a minibus full of circus performers driving through the Arctic.

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Tokyo University and NHK on the verge of touch-o-vision: Television you can truly feel a part of

On 23 May, NHK announced that it has been working with Tokyo University to create a way to not only transmit images over long distances but to also send the sense of touch. Using this, viewers would also become able to actually feel whatever appeared on screen with their own hands.

This system makes use of Tokyo University’s newly developed device which can measure the dimensions and hardness of an object in three dimensions simultaneously. On the other end, NHK has been hard at work on a Touch/Force Display which would allow viewers to get tactile feedback from the images presented on screen.

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Newsflash: AKB48 members attacked by saw-wielding “fan” at handshake event【UPDATED】

At 4:55 p.m. today, the company behind many of Japan’s larger idol groups, AKS, released a statement regarding an attack on members of AKB48 and event staff during a handshake event in Iwate Prefecture this afternoon.

Members Rina Kawaei (19) and Anna Iriyama (18), as well as a male member of the venue staff, are said to have been injured, with a 24-year-old male taken into police custody.

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Over 2,000 Saitama residents to get refunds from the police for “erroneously” issued tickets

For those who woke up in Saitama Prefecture this morning, you might have noticed something particularly pleasant in the air, like the entire region just got a little happier. That’s because on 22 May the Prefectural Police announced that they would be giving refunds and apologies to 2,400 people who were given tickets and demerit points because of an improperly conducted eight-year crackdown on driving violations.

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“The Man Who Was Slashed 50,000 Times” gets his first starring role in upcoming film

Since the 1950s, Seizo Fukumoto has been a fixture of seemingly any Japanese production involving samurai. However, you probably wouldn’t recognize his face as he tends to be given the role of “guy who gets killed.” Although he has occasionally taken work outside of period pieces, his constant roles as “soon-to-be-dead guy #2” has earned him the industry title: The Man Who Was Slashed 50,000 Times.

Having enjoyed a long and bloody career in cinema slightly off center-stage, Fukumoto has finally been given his chance at a starring role in Uzumasa Limelight, a new film hitting Japanese theatres this summer.

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Zhongshan man makes the catch of his life: a one-year-old child

For those of you who thought phys-ed class never taught skills valuable in the real world, we bring you the story and footage of one Mr. Li of Zhongshan City, Guangdong.

Upon seeing an infant at a second-story window, the man dashed below and readied himself to make the most important catch of his life.

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