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Master Blaster

Writer / Translator

Master Blaster is the two-man translating team of Canada’s Steven Le Blanc and Japan’s Masami M, a pair who in addition to writing work are in English education and created the StudyNow app for Japanese students of English.

Together they have written somewhere around 1,500 articles for RocketNews24 covering such diverse topics as Chinese men selling sanitary napkins to each other and a Japanese guy dragging an ear of corn around the Tokyo train system. A few of these were actually good, but don’t take our word for it! Here’s what our beloved readers had to say:

“One isn't always in the mood for bold tastes. But when I'm in the mood for bold flavor I turn to you.”
“Stupid article. Who cares what the Japanese think it's cool. You don't call a monkey, "gorilla".”
“You know, this is about the most cogent explanation of how a turbocharger works that I have ever seen in the non-motorsports world.”
“Thanks for the article peter!”
“It's people like you who make exploitation possible.”
“It looks yummy and the story was great. Thank you for the smile.”

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Posted by Master Blaster (Page 166)

Japanese Government and Industries Battle Copyright Infringement by Hiding Strongly Worded Letters on P2P Networks

On 25 January, Japan’s Ministry of Internal Affairs and Communications along with various motion picture and music associations announced their latest copyright protection measure, dubbed “Operation Decoy File.”

The plan involves inserting files onto Japan’s popular P2P (peer-to-peer) file sharing networks such as Winny and Share which appear to contain popular copyrighted material.  However, once downloaded, the file is revealed to be a message appealing the user to reconsider their wicked ways.

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Japan’s Secret Weapon Against the Flu Deemed Ineffective by Ministry of Health

According to Japan’s Ministry of Health, Labor, and Welfare (MHLW) during the period of 14-20 January, the number of influenza cases in the country has exceeded 110,000.

Schools and facilities for the elderly across Japan have been pushing a traditional three pronged attack against the flu virus. First, hand washing is a no-brainer (or at least it out to be). Also, anyone who has been to Japan has probably experienced the country’s love of surgical masks.

The third line of defense, however, is rather unique to Japan: gargling.  Although gargling is embraced worldwide as a soothing massage for throats sore from overuse or illness, in Japan it has been widely regarded for generations as a preventative measure against cold or flu viruses.

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A few days after a mysterious list of the 51 busiest train stations in the world emerged on the Internet an expanded version listing the 100 busiest train stations around the globe has shown itself.

Although other countries such as China and Germany made appearances, the densely populated island of Japan still holds 82 of the bustling transport hubs. And while Japan seems full of stations that resemble Willy Wonka’s Chocolate Factory, only the top 10 are really that freakishly large and chaotic.

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American Make-Your-Own-Pancake Restaurant “Slappy Cakes” Imports Deliciousness to Japan *UPDATED*

Slappy Cakes is a popular pancake restaurant in Portland Oregon that lets customers create their own custom pancakes at their tables. It’s a fun time for those who want a completely new pancake experience. However, its popularity has resulted in some long wait times.

Luckily, Slappy Cakes’ success has allowed it to expand, but rather than add another location in Portland they decided to set up shop in completely uncharted DIY pancake house territory: Shinjuku, Tokyo. We sent Mr. Sato to a pre-opening demonstration for a report.

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The world is full of countless foods and ways of eating them. It’s impossible to keep track of them all. I was surprised to discover salty watermelons, just as other people were surprised by my preference of putting peanut butter on waffles.

Such an incident happened on 19 January when a Japanese test maker unknowingly confused thousands of university entrance exam students with a recipe for a meat sauce calling for a “delicious kimchi base.”

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Domino’s Pizza’s “Shortest Sale in the World” Being Held for 0.1 Seconds

Domino’s Japan enjoys coming up with promotions that sets them apart from other pizza joints. Whether offering luxury pizzas or giving discounts to bearded twins wearing Bon Jovi T-shirts and/or carrying a parakeet, the chain tends to grab people’s attention.

Limber up your index fingers because Domino’s Japan has started the “Shortest Sale in the World” from 1-3 February. While three days doesn’t seems so short, the actual sale occurs for only 0.1 seconds at a time.

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Japanese Government Hints at Issuing 50,000 Yen Bills, We Wonder What They’ll Look Like

A major flaw of Japanese currency is the 10,000 yen bill ceiling of banknotes.

For daily life, having a system of bills which max out at around 100 bucks US is not a problem. But for those special times when you want to buy something high-end like a computer or melons, your wallet suddenly swells to the size of a baseball.  In country that largely shuns checks or debit cards, cash is still king – a thick, hard to fit in your back pocket king.

Rumors are swirling about financial reforms in the works by Shinzo Abe’s recently elected Liberal Democratic Party involving, among other things, the issuing of 50,000 yen bills.　Yes, it looks like – for once – a politician is looking out for the needs of people with too much money.

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A couple of days ago this little graph surfaced online displaying some interesting statistics. It’s a bar chart of the busiest train stations in the world, measured by the number of people who pass through them each year.

Perhaps coming as no surprise to those who have experienced its mind-numbingly complex transport complexes, Japan tops the list. What is surprising is the degree to which Japan dominates this list, with all but six stations residing here, and about half of them in the Tokyo area alone.

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What’s Better than Chocolate Beer? Chocolate Beer in a Chocolate Glass!

Kanagawa-based brewery Sankt Gallen has been turning heads with their unique brands of chocolate beers. Released on 10 January, these beers provide a welcome change to the typical chocolate gifts of Valentine’s Day (generally, guys aren’t really that into pure chocolate).

But it appears that Sankt Gallen has raised the stakes more with their new combo set of a 330 mL bottle of their Imperial Chocolate Stout, complete with an edible glass made entirely of chocolate.

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Nerd Oriented Dating Guide on Sale, The Art of Seduction Presented in Manga

Although the recent otaku marriage hunting party showed good results, millions of nerds still have to struggle with more conventional dating methods. Feeling ill-equipped in the social graces, these poor souls further entrench themselves in their obsessions lessening the chances of hooking up even more.

Luckily to the rescue comes Who’s Afraid of the Goukon? the latest book by Yoshi. This book is intended for mainly for otaku nerdy types but could be used by anyone feeling too socially awkward to take part in the Japanese group blind dates known as goukon.

Heavily-illustrated with manga examples, this how-to guide depicts the entire goukon culture assuming the reader knows absolutely nothing about them and provides hints as well as dispelling common misconceptions about these outings.

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Man, I wish someone told me this in the days of free AOL trial CDs.

It seems that putting an ordinary Compact Disc into your average microwave creates freaky lightning and a dramatic fiery demise.

Although you might expect them simply to burn up like an iPhone does, these data storage discs actually provide a kick-ass light show first.

This little known scientific gem was beautifully photographed and uploaded to Twitter, which then led to the discovery of a YouTube video documenting microwaved CDs.  So please don’t kill your microwave or yourself trying this – just check out these videos and pictures instead.

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Toothbrush Hero! Candy Maker Plans to Fight Cavities through Video Games

Major Japanese food conglomerate Morinaga had a dilemma to face.  Children have loved their fruity Hi-Chew candies for a long time but the high sugar content means eating too much can be bad for their teeth.

Just as tooth decay ravages ones pearly whites, so does poor hygiene affect Morinaga’s bottom line. You can’t eat chewy candy without teeth after all.

That’s why the confectioner has declared war on tooth decay.  To do this they have invented and are testing the “world’s first” toothbrush training video game to prefect the nation’s tykes’ dental habits.

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During a press conference on 25 January, Takeshi Endo, a representative for, JGC Corp, the construction firm working at the ill-fated Tigantourine natural gas plant told the story of one lucky survivor who was rescued by the Algerian workers there.
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This Valentine’s Day Let That Special Guy Eat Your Face with Some Fava Beans and a Nice Chianti

Valentine’s Day is just around the corner. In Japan this means it’s time for women to bestow gifts of chocolate unto the men in their life.  However, for the guys who are really special, homemade chocolate awaits.  That personal touch makes all the difference.

The Fab Café in Shibuya Tokyo is setting up a workshop which uses a state of the art 3D printer to create the ultimate in personal chocolate.

On 14 February, much like how Mr. Sato had himself made into a figurine, participating women will be able to sculpt their own likeness on a chocolate truffle this season.

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Hey, Slimebags!! No, Not You – Limited Edition Bags to be Handed Out at Lawson Convenience Stores

Arguably Japan’s most successful video game franchise and mightiest convenience store chain are joining forces again to celebrate the re-release of Dragon Quest VII: Warriors of Eden (aka Dragon Warrior VII) for the Nintendo 3DS.

In their previous celebration of Dragon Quest X a limited edition plastic bag was handed out stylized after the hit game online game.  This time they’re taking it further with a new style of bag never before seen from Lawson’s – and possibly never again.

There are two types of bags available each depicting the lovable enemy “slime” from the Dragon Quest series.

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Giant Hadouken Fired Over Kanto Region, Internet Sky Gazers Track It

Beginning at around 2:45am on 20 January, Tweets were appearing with reports of an “explosion” and a glowing object falling from the sky.  On the same day a video showing the meteor in high detail began to spread across the Japanese internet.

From the video we can easily see that this was no average meteor – this was a fireball.

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Two members of the Kanagawa Prefecture Police Force were arrested late last week on charges of extortion. Sergeants Mori and Arakawa of the Traffic Division and Organized Crime Unit, respectively, are believed to have abused their higher rank in order to coerce two female junior police officers into exchanging clothes in front of them. Sgt. Mori, meanwhile, is facing assault charges after he is believed to have attempted to kiss the pair.

Full details after the jump.

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New Head Priest of Controversial Yasukuni Shrine Appointed

Yasuhisa Tokugawa is a descendant of the Tokugawa family consisting of the legendary Shoguns such Ieyasu Tokugawa. Yasuhisa, now 64, had a successful career in the oil business from which he retired.

Now he’s doing what you’d probably expect a retired business man to do: he became the head priest of the most controversial shrine in Japan.

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Propaganda is an ugly art. History is full of distorted and racist imagery of one nation’s enemies during times of war. Looking back on them now we can chuckle at the absurd lengths people went to in an effort to instill hate in one another, but they often remain shocking nonetheless.

This series of paintings from North Korea surfaced on the internet around 2010, but it’s uncertain exactly when they were created. Judging by the American uniforms they’re most likely Korean War era. We can also see this by the one where US soldiers are depicted sawing open a guy’s head (they got lasers to do that nowadays).

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The Nihlistic Bus Schedule Advertisements of Tsukuba, Now in English!

Think back to the last time you saw an advertisement for a bus schedule.  Difficult isn’t it? Even on the off chance you have seen one before, it probably wasn’t so attention-grabbing as to stick in your memory.

It’s not like bus schedules need advertising anyway.  Either you use one or you don’t, no amount of persuading will likely change that.

Nevertheless, Tsukuba Tekken, a travel and rail association affiliated with Tsukuba University in Japan, has for years been designing quirky advertisements for their on-campus bus schedules.

Displayed in limited locations around the university, these posters have become a local legend both for their mystery and unorthodox content. So sit back and enjoy these advertisements translated into English.

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