Master Blaster

Writer / Translator

Master Blaster is the two-man translating team of Canada’s Steven Le Blanc and Japan’s Masami M, a pair who in addition to writing work are in English education and created the StudyNow app for Japanese students of English.

Together they have written somewhere around 1,500 articles for RocketNews24 covering such diverse topics as Chinese men selling sanitary napkins to each other and a Japanese guy dragging an ear of corn around the Tokyo train system. A few of these were actually good, but don’t take our word for it! Here’s what our beloved readers had to say:

“One isn't always in the mood for bold tastes. But when I'm in the mood for bold flavor I turn to you.”
“Stupid article. Who cares what the Japanese think it's cool. You don't call a monkey, "gorilla".”
“You know, this is about the most cogent explanation of how a turbocharger works that I have ever seen in the non-motorsports world.”
“Thanks for the article peter!”
“It's people like you who make exploitation possible.”
“It looks yummy and the story was great. Thank you for the smile.”

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Posted by Master Blaster (Page 174)

Viral Video Worlds Collide: Hitler Raps to Gangnam Style

Hey! You got your Hitler videos in my K-Pop! You got your K-Pop in my Hitler videos!  Who would have thought that these two viral video titans would blend together so well?

The Chinese genius who created Dictator Rap: Gangnam Style from Hitler, that’s who.

The maker goes by the name Fei Yu from Luoyang, China, who posted the video on Chinese video site, bilibili.tv. From there it spread to YouTube and infamy.

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In Koga city, Shiga prefecture on October 3 at 9am a manhole cover unexpectedly shot seven meters into the air penetrating the roof over a gas station’s pumps.  The 36kg lid measuring 65cm in diameter returned to the ground luckily without hitting anyone.

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Lotteria’s Tower Cheeseburger Returns and It Brought Friends: Value, Shrimp, and Puns

Japanese fast food chain Lotteria is celebrating its 40th anniversary by bringing back the Tower Cheeseburger!  Yes, the Tower Cheeseburger is nothing new: RocketNews24 has reported on it before and, of course, made an ungodly sized burger out of it (pictured above).

Worry not though, as Lotteria has a lot more in store for its big 4-0.  For starters, the price of their 5-storey (five beef patties and five cheese slices) Tower Cheeseburger this year will cost a measly 500 yen! (US$6)

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Chinese Man’s Bladder Explodes after Drinking Game Turns Deadly

It’s a typical drinking challenge that many guys have gotten into at one point or another.  The first person to “break the seal,” or use the bathroom first, is the sucker who picks up the check.

Good times are had watching guys squirm it out and race to the urinal before wetting themselves, and all the funnier if they don’t make it in time.

However, for one group of friends in China, their friendly wager turned tragic leading to the near death of one man.

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Hitachi’s New Quartz Storage Technology Lets You Keep Your Data Safe for a Long, Long Time

At the recent International Symposium on Optical Memory in Tokyo, Hitachi, working with Kyoto University, presented their new type of digital storage.  It works on a principle similar to CDs but with a few added benefits like withstanding over 1000℃ temperatures.

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Despite China’s booming development in recent years, their media has been reluctant to toot their own patriotic horn and limited themselves to phrases like “potential superpower”.

It looks like the kid gloves are off now though, as South China Post kicked off the newest nickname for the PRC, “beginning superpower” last week.  This follows a busy summer of superpower-like imposition and disregard for neighboring countries all along the nation’s coasts.

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Office Meeting Room Desk that Charges Mobile Devices Developed

With all the constant updates to smartphones and other portable devices, you would think it would be easy to maintain decent battery power by now. But no matter how smart Siri seems to get, most people still have to charge her up on a daily basis.

Some companies have decided to tackle this problem by making charging more accessible, which is where the desk above comes in:  this unassuming piece of office furniture also has a built in wireless battery charger.

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Breakthrough in Plastic Bag Technology Promises a More Stable Future

Plastic shopping bags are one of those things that haven’t been improved on since… ever?  Sure there have been attempts to improve their biodegradability, but that’s hardly the limit to their inherent weaknesses.

This is especially well-known in Japan where premade soups and bentos fly off the shelves of supermarkets and convenience stores like premade hotcakes.  Using a traditional plastic bag to carry a curry rice bento always gets tilted onto its side so that it ends up looking like a crime scene when you get it home.  You’re luck if the curry actually stays inside the container.

Lunch Vehicle may be the answer to this problem, taking plastic bags to the next level with its innovative design which has been influenced by tried and tested heavy industry techniques.

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No doubt, by now Japan’s super toilets (known as washlets) have become a well-known symbol this country. Their bevy of features like heating and cleaning add an unprecedented level of comfort to our porcelain thrones.

However, there’s a dark side to Japan’s restrooms: what’s known as the “Japanese Style Toilet.” For those lucky enough to have never encountered one, it’s a throwback to the olden days of going in a hole in the ground.  Only this time the hole is covered in porcelain and has flushing capabilities. Beyond that it’s not much different than camping or surviving a plane crash in the mountains.

Thankfully some special interest groups are working towards wiping this scourge from the nation, and they’re starting with the children.

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Rocksmith’s Japanese Commercial Seems to Defy You to Buy It, Employs Aki Toyosaki

After mastering Guitar Hero years back, I was left with an empty feeling.  I had taken my plastic 4-button guitar controller out on the street to perform One by Metallica but no one paid any attention to me.  In fact, passersby seemed to be intentionally avoiding eye contact.

This is why I was excited to find Rocksmith would be released in Japan on October 11.  The game that actually lets you practice a real guitar in a fun way so you can walk away from it a better person with an entertaining skill!

However, my excitement took a bit of a hit when I saw the first Japanese commercial for it.

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Junior College Establishes Idol Department, Courses Include Make-Up and Dancing

 

The post-secondary education business has entered dire straits in Japan.  With the ever declining birth rate, schools across the nation are struggling to keep enrollments up.

In Fukuoka, Nishi-Nippon Junior College believes it has an attractive solution to this problem: the “Department of Media Promotion,” more casually referred to as the “Idol Training Department.

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Is It Possible to Take a Photo of Mount Fuji from Kyoto? One Teacher Says Yes

Alright all you photographers, this might be your chance to take a historical, never-before seen shot of Mt. Fuji taken 261km (162mi) away in Kyoto.  Although it was calculated to be possible by a geography teacher at Tsukuba University High School, Hiroshi Tashiro, it’s certain to be easier said than done.

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Korean Baby Got Back for About Twenty Bucks at the Market

South Koreans like big butts and they cannot lie, but those Japanese brothers try to deny.  That’s right. It looks like the big butt trend has finally hit this side of the Pacific.  The first nation to fall victim to a big ol’ badonkadonk: South Korea.

One of our reporters got a first-hand experience while travelling there recently, when she stumbled across a pair of padded panties designed to give you that extra junk for your trunk.

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[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sUtS52lqL5w?feature=oembed&w=640&h=360%5D

Behold the Lego Great Ball Contraption (GBC), dreamed, designed and built by a 21 year-old Japanese college student who goes by the name of Akiyuki, (Akiyuky if you want to search him on YouTube).

Taking over 600 hours of work, this robotic wonder is the perfect blend of engineering and art as the 31 meters of 17 intricately built stages hypnotically and seamlessly operate with the sole existential purpose of moving tiny plastic soccer balls and basketballs in a perpetual loop.

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A research team from Tokushima University discovered that a substance found in hops can prevent the deterioration of muscle tissue.  The breaking down of muscles in old age is a leading cause of elderly people being confined to a bed.

This is great news if only a beer or two would do the trick.  Unfortunately, to harness the anti-aging effects of ale you’d have to drink enough to kill you several times over.

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Burger King Hopes Once You Go Black, You Never Go Back with their new Kuro Burger

Burger King is currently celebrating their 5th year in Japan.  But in an already saturated fast food market the famous American chain is a little late to the game.

So, in an effort to truly stand out from the crowd, Burger King Japan has designed fast food’s first black hamburger.  Dubbed the Kuro Burger (lit. Black Burger), it will go on sale for a limited time starting 28 September.

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A student from a private integrated junior high/ high school in Tokyo filed a complaint with the Tokyo Metropolitan Police as a victim of bullying.  It was later learned that the 15 year-old high school student was allegedly advised by his principal not to go to the police on threat of not being able to enter high school.

The boy and his mother claim that he was sworn to silence as a condition of his graduating from middle school.  However, as the bullying continued into high school he decided to go to the police.

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Avant-Garde Ramen to be Served at Tokyo Game Show, But Is Anyone Iron-Gutted Enough to Eat It?

The Tokyo Game show always has displays and products guaranteed to shock and amaze video game fans from all over.  This year they seem to be leaning more towards the shock with this gourmet experiment.

Remember when you were a kid, you and your friends would put mustard, salt, ketchup, and squished meat into a McDonald’s cup of cola and dared each other to drink it?

This seems to be the concept behind this Soy Milk Curry Ipecac Ramen.

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Sadly these days, we see more and more stories of crimes committed against young children.  That’s why reporting anything out of the ordinary can help save lives.

However, on the Hyogo Prefectural Police operated online crime prevention board, “Hyogo Security Net” a suspicious person report was posted that made several people stop and scratch their heads.  The police seem to have an APB out on themselves.

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[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FxMOOyQI99g?feature=oembed&w=640&h=360%5D

In the days following Nono-Chan the cat’s 8th birthday, he began to take stock of his life.  He wondered if chasing strings and sleep was all there was. “Have I reached my fullest potential as a cat,” he pondered.

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