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Famous Japanese television personality mimics what foreign languages sound like to non-speakers

Mike
Dec 8, 2014
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Kazuyoshi Morita – better known as Tamori-san, the pet name that a loving Japanese public has addressed him by for decades – is one of the longest-running comedians to appear on Japanese TV. He’s been around so long, we assume he got his start doing stand-up before TVs were even invented.

In addition to being the longest-running host of a live television program, having hosted the widely beloved morning variety show Waratteii Tomou, Tamori-san is also famous for his talent in mono mane (doing impressions). While this is common knowledge in Japan, it apparently took a decade-or-so-old clip of a (still very old-looking) younger Tamori-chan doing spot-on impressions of what foreign languages sound like to non-speakers to wake the rest of the world up to his unique skill set.

A funny thing happened at the game center: 10 strange crane game tweets from Japan

Michelle Lynn Dinh
Dec 8, 2014

Game centers in Japan promise a treasure trove of riches for those skilled at coaxing small prizes from their crane game glass housings, but endless frustration for anyone who hasn’t had plenty of practice. If you’ve ever been to Japan, you’ve probably played a crane game or two yourself, but we have a feeling you’ve never seen something like the following Twitter users captured. Let’s take a look at 10 strange happenings at game centers across Japan.

Japanese pianist stuns us with faithful representation of Mario Kart music and sound effects

Preston Phro
Dec 8, 2014

Fan covers of video game music are nothing new by this point, but that doesn’t make them any less awesome. We’ve seen metal covers, beautiful acoustic covers, and NES cartridge harmonicas, but rarely have we seen someone so dedicated to conveying every sound in a game.

Using nothing more than two pianos, this niconico video user plays both the in-game audio and the sound effects. As one commenter put it, “This was so amazing, I almost forgot to comment!”

These “Engrish” T-shirts are kinda lame, compared to what we’re used to

Evie Nyan
Dec 8, 2014

Call us cynical, but we find that our standards over what constitutes funny Engrish have been changing. Unless it’s something really hilarious, perhaps involving naughty words or references to embarrassing body parts, we just can’t muster up the same kind of enthusiasm we once had. When it comes to English that’s just a little bit off in certain ways, it’s sometimes just not that funny, especially when you understand the number of reasons why Engrish happens in the first place. However, visitors to Japan will always remember that first taste of Engrish fondly, even if the same example might fail to raise an eyebrow after a few years of acclimatizing. The last piece of Engrish I felt was worthy of documenting can be seen above – it’s a T-shirt from a store in Osaka and several years later it still blows my mind. However, there’s also plenty of pretty mediocre Engrish to be found, as we’ll demonstrate after the jump.

The 20 most wanted Christmas presents in Japan

Hayashi 'Fang' Hougi
Dec 8, 2014

Amazon Japan decided to hold its own Cyber Monday sale a few weeks after the North American counterpart. Through the campaign and sales data, they have announced the 20 most wanted Christmas presents in Japan. Clinching the top spot was none other than Sony’s PlayStation 4 which while not the dazzling success that it has been outside Japan has seen strong sales numbers since launch.

But what else do the people of Japan really want this Christmas? Check out the rest of the list below!

Train station in Japan devises an adorable new way to prevent roadside bicycle parking

Hayashi 'Fang' Hougi
Dec 7, 2014

Illegally parking bicycles is a persistent problem in Japan, and one creative train station has come up with a new strategy to stop people from leaving bikes where they shouldn’t – by putting cute illustrations done by children on the ground!

Now even cats in Japan are taking post-breakup selfies!

Fran W
Dec 7, 2014

Twitter photo comics were the platform for a six-panel post-breakup transformation meme earlier this year.

Using the tagline “you broke up with me ’cause that girl’s cuter?” (‘ano ko no hou ga kawaii kara’), the comics typically show a girl transforming herself from a bookish persona into a fully made-up “cute” version of herself.

Then, men started doing them too. And cats. And babies.

McDonald’s Japan may be winning back fans with Crab Croquette Burger

Master Blaster
Dec 7, 2014

2014 has not been a stellar year for McDonald’s Japan. The tainted chicken scandal of midyear rocked the fast-food chain so much that it’s core audience of netizens decried every offering since. It wasn’t for lack of trying as they hauled out some alternative tofu nuggets only to float back to chicken nuggets offered for free. The company then tried offering the sophisticated taste of mushroom risotto balls and a tonkatsu (fried pork cutlet) burger with sauce selected by a nationwide search.

However, all of these efforts fell on deaf ears and itchy typing fingers hammering out comments such as “Never again” and “It’s too easy to see they’re fine with using dodgy meat.” It had gotten to the point that you might think Japan had turned its collective back on McDonald’s forever, but as the New Year’s song goes: Should old acquaintance be forgot?

Maybe so as McDonald’s Japan’s latest offering has been getting a relatively warm response, and all it took was a little crabbiness.

This dog does NOT want to go home and her adorable defiance is cracking up the Internet【Video】

Audrey Akcasu
Dec 7, 2014

Have you ever been on a vacation or had such a good day that you just didn’t want to go back home and return to the daily grind? You’re not alone. In fact, sometimes even dogs don’t want their jaunts into the big outside world to end.

One Japanese dog was so adamant about not wanting to go home after her walk in the park, that she just laid on the ground and refused to get up, but with a big ole smile on her face the whole time. She was so dogged (pun very much intended) that the owner had no choice but to take this adorable video.

Mr. Sato takes a sperm test, passes with flying colors

Master Blaster
Dec 7, 2014

Our ace reporter Mr. Sato is currently into his 40s and during a conversation with one of his peers the other day he learnt that men of that age run a certain risk of diminished sperm. For instance, the man he was talking to recently got tested only to find that his sperm count was dropping to what he called the “requiem” stage.

This prompted Mr. Sato to actually think about what was going on down there, so he decided to get checked himself to make sure he wasn’t in his reproductive autumn as well. Luckily, it was learned that not only is Mr. Sato healthy but there’s a party in his pants…and yes, we’re all invited!

Dog seems to appear from plank of wood in either coolest pet trick or silliest astral projection

Casey Baseel
Dec 7, 2014

I can’t help but laugh every time I hear a story about people finding an image of Jesus in some household setting. It’s not so much their spiritual fervor that gives me a chuckle, though, but the incongruent nature of the logic being shown. On one hand, he’s powerful enough to send messages to true believers from across the boundaries of our mortal realm, but on the other, he chooses to make his appearance in a piece of singed toast or an oil stain on someone’s driveway?

Call me cynical, but I’m not convinced the son of God rolls that way. That kid of haphazard choice of manifestation setting seems more like the work of a lower being, like maybe a dog who’s still getting the hang of how to project himself through the astral plane.

Speaking of which…

Police crack down on bar, adult establishment touts during year-end

Japan Today
Dec 7, 2014

Police in Tokyo have stepped up patrols in popular nightlife areas such as Shibuya, Shinjuku and Roppongi in an effort to reduce the presence of touts who stand outside shops or on corners and attempt to lure customers to their establishments with promises of cute waitresses, cheap drinks and other attractions.

Yamato undies remind you where you put your junk

Anime News Network
Dec 7, 2014

The Yamato Crew store is selling a specially designed pair of men’s boxer shorts. The one-size-fits-all underwear takes design cues from actual anime artwork.

Cute dog turns traditional fish pond into personal swimming pool【Photos】

Jessica
Dec 6, 2014

If you’ve ever been to Thailand, you know that it can get really hot. It’s enough to make anyone look longingly at the nearest fountain, pond or puddle. Well, add a fur coat to that equation and I get why this Thai dog decided he wasn’t going to let a few guppies get in the way of a quick, cooling dip!

You might never eat seafood again after you watch this horrifying lobster molting on land

Mike
Dec 6, 2014

When we posted a video of an enormous, pulsating, terrifying spider crab slowly escaping the confines of its old shell and setting off in search of new digs and (probably) human souls, we thought that was about the most horrifying the process of molting could really get.

Then we saw this video of a spiny lobster molting on land. We will never be the same.

Skinny Japanese man isn’t skinny enough, makes greatest face at realization!【Photos】

KK Miller
Dec 6, 2014

Japanese people have a stereotype for being incredibly tiny. Grown men and women can shop in the “junior” section, which is a handy way to save a bit of money, especially when buying some brand name items. But just because you “can” doesn’t mean you “should“. One Japanese “baller” finds out the hard way that some children-only items should really only be used by children. Unless you are looking for a new and permanent metal chastity belt.

Craving cheese? Try Burger King Japan’s hamburger cheese fondue!

Kay
Dec 6, 2014

In Japan, the New Years is traditionally a time for eating osechi cuisine, and while tastes and lifestyles may be changing, come New Years Day, many people will be eating at least some of these special new year foods. And once all the new years festivities have passed, it’s quite understandable if some of the Japanese public ends up yearning for something a bit more oily and rich. Well, Burger King Japan has just announced a new series of menus that just may fit the bill in such a situation. It’s Burger King Japan’s new “cheese fondue” menu, featuring items that allow you to create fondues out of … you guessed it, hamburgers!

Strange English signs in China and Japan really hate vegetables, sometimes threaten to kill you

Casey Baseel
Dec 6, 2014

We’ve talked before about some of the reasons why bizarre English signage pops up in Asia. One of the most common causes is a fundamental difference in the way sentences are structured between English and other languages. Automated translations programs, which aren’t nearly as well sorted out as many monolingual users believe, are also among the usual suspects.

That said, looking at a flawed translation is sort of like performing an autopsy, in that sometimes there’s a limit in what it can tell you. Just like the medical examiner might say, “Well, all the baby spiders hatching inside the subject’s eyeball definitely killed him, but I’ve got no idea how the eggs got in there,” there are times like these when we look at some garbled English, and, just like we can’t stifle our chuckles, we can’t imagine why the translation went flying off the rails, or if it was even on them to begin with.

Just in time for 2015! Hoverboard becomes reality, proves Back to the Future was legit

Evie Nyan
Dec 6, 2014

Remember that scene in the classic 80’s movie Back to the Future Part II, where Marty McFly escapes a group of bullies using a floating skateboard known as a hoverboard? If you do, you probably spent your childhood longing for one of those bad boys and wondering when technology would catch up to the 2015 depicted in the film. Well, it looks like we’ve managed to make it a reality, and just before the cut-off date, too! Join us after the jump for video evidence!

Pepsi reboots Japan’s Peach Boy with 3 action and monster-filled ads that’re 8 kinds of badass

Casey Baseel
Dec 6, 2014

The story of Momotaro is one of Japan’s oldest folktales, but a lot of its elements seem a little silly. For starters, the hero’s name translates as “Peach Boy.” His companions are a monkey, a dog, and a pheasant, who he wins over by giving them some sweet dumplings in exchange for their help against the story’s villains, who all have outie bellybuttons.

Goofy as these details may sound, though, the core of the tale is absolutely epic. A young hero who harnesses the power of wild beasts, then sails into the heart of demon territory to rumble with them on their island fortress? In a world where every literary and comic character is a candidate to become a darkly stylish action hero (heck, even Batman’s gritty reboot is getting its own gritty reboot), why hasn’t someone revamped Peach Boy into something closer to Peach Man?

Actually, someone already has, but you won’t find the new Momotaro in theatres, and while you might catch him flipping through the channels on TV, you can’t find his adventures scheduled in the program guide. That’s because this amazingly awesome version of Momortaro is actually a series of commercials from Pepsi.