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Language fail: 22 funny and embarrassing tales of Japanese language missteps

They say that one of the main reasons so few Japanese people master the English language is because they’re worried about making mistakes or embarrassing themselves. While we do wish more Japanese would break out their English a little more often (get a couple of drinks into your coworkers and you’ll be amazed at how much English they actually know), at the same time we can’t really blame them for being reluctant to speak, because learning a second language as an adult can be tough.

After all, when our words fail us, it can not only result in confusion, but very often shock, laughter, and even anger. Just ask the kind folks who were good enough to share with us their most awkward and memorable mistakes made when speaking – or rather trying to speak – Japanese.

Join us after the jump for 22 tales of language mishaps. Oh, and maybe make some notes while you do so that none of these ever happen to you!

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Japan’s tax agency considers protected designation for Japanese sake

Okay, Rocketeers, time for a pop quiz: what is Japanese sake? Turns out the question is actually a little more complicated than it looks on the surface.

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Sushi suitcase covers are back, this time with new flavors!

In most countries, when you think of conveyor belts you might think of factories, but in Japan, most people’s minds would probably jump first to sushi. Conveyor belt sushi is not only delicious and cheap, but it adds a little fun to your meal.

Some innovative designers decided to take that fun and add it to another common conveyor belt: airport luggage carousels. Last year Parco released their first edition of sushi suitcase covers, but this year they are back with three new flavors.

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Tower Records celebrates Super Mario Bros.’ 30th anniversary with cafe and sale

It’s hard to believe it’s been 30 years since Nintendo first unveiled Super Mario Bros. on the original Japanese NES, or Famicon as it’s known in Japan. With over 200 games and counting, Super Mario has become the best selling video game franchise of all time. We’ve seen the video game icon get sucked into the Mushroom Kingdom to save Princess Peach on countless occasions, and become a legendary go-kart racer and sports athlete, as recapped here.

Mario’s been used to sell everything from Mercedes to Converse, and this time, to commemorate the 30th anniversary of the industry-changing Super Mario Bros. video game, Tower Records is teaming up with Mario for a special limited edition cafe and summer sale at participating stores.

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Make your tummy happy, eat a kimchi yogurt rice bowl today

In the boring and often mildly terrifying world of being a competent adult, there comes a time when you have to start eating healthily or face the horrible consequences. Junk food somehow seems less appealing when you have to factor in the inevitable side effects such as bloating, stomach cramps, and bad skin.

So we’re always looking for new things to eat that have added beauty benefits, and recently a secret super recipe has come to our attention which involves adding a dollop of yogurt and kimchi to our rice bowls.

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The Guardian: Sony to present The Last Guardian at E3

U.K. newspaper The Guardian published an article on Tuesday where it stated that it “[has] it on good authority” that Sony will display The Last Guardian game at this year’s E3 trade fair.

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The top 10 worst men’s fashion items, as rated by Japanese women

As a guy, sometimes knowing the difference between what looks good and what doesn’t can be a challenge. I know that I personally value functionality over fashion: why should I buy new shoes when my three-year-old ones still fit fine? They only have a couple of holes in them. And what’s wrong with my fanny pack? It’s perfecting for holding all my trading cards!

Thankfully for us guys, Niconico News recently put out the results of a survey given to 200 women, asking them to rate the worst clothing/accessories for men. Does your wardrobe get off scot-free, or are you a proud owner of everything on the list? Find out after the jump!

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Hardcore tofu consumption lands man in hospital with over 500 kidney stones

In the food world, there a few items more innocuous than tofu, with its bland color and taste, squishy texture, and low calorie count. In fact, if you could tolerate eating tofu day in day out, most would say you’re living a pretty healthy lifestyle.

But not so fast! It would appear that looks, taste, and generally positive nutritional information can be deceiving. Just ask one 55-year-old tofu-lover who, over time, turned his kidney into a terrarium with about 500 kidney stones inside at once.

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The Japanese are rather enthusiastic when it comes to recycling. In most Japanese cities, domestic waste has to be separated into a minimum of three categories: combustable “raw” garbage, recyclable plastic and recyclable paper. Some areas have their residents splitting their trash into as many as 10 categories.

Even with that said, there’s probably no place in Japan more outreach than Kyoto when it comes to recycling plastic, as they’ve had a little magical help from a handsome new mascot: Gomi no Yousei (Fairy of the Garbage). Check out the bizarre recycling enthusiast after the break!

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  • Jun 10, 2015

The magic is back! Adorable Sailor Moon gashapon transformation toys to be re-released this year

Yes, we love our gashapon toys here in Japan. They’re inexpensive, readily available, and we can’t seem to get enough of them… especially if they’re cute, sparkly miniature Sailor Moon transformation toys!

That’s right — back by popular demand, toy manufacturer (and apparently all-round good guys) Bandai will be re-releasing the “Sailor Moon Transformation Compact Mirror” and the “Sailor Moon Stick and Rod” series of miniature toys, and with the intricate details and bright colors that are sure to capture fans’ hearts, they’re every bit as magically charming as they were before!

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Western-style weddings are overwhelmingly popular in Japan, and especially among young couples, outnumber Japanese-style ceremonies by a wide margin. In many ways, Western ceremonies in Japan are similar to what you’d see in the U.S. The bride wears a dress, the groom a tuxedo, and the pair exchanges vows and seals the deal with a kiss. The reception, likewise, usually involves toasts, a fancy dinner, and a bouquet toss.

But despite Japan’s rather open obsession with women’s undergarments, the garter toss isn’t a wedding tradition here. But the absence of a male equivalent to the bouquet toss has been noticed by some who are soon to be married, and they’ve hit upon the offbeat solution of having the men in attendance try to catch a bunch of broccoli thrown by the groom.

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In Japan, the is no more dominant name in the ready-to-eat pickled ginger game than Iwashita New Ginger. Their stalks of sweet and spicy roots soaked in vinegar and sugar are sure to satisfy those looking for an all-natural snack.

But don’t think for a second that Iwashita is resting on those laurels. They are constantly creating innovative promotional ideas to make people aware of just how satisfying their pickled gingers are. Starting on June 20 they will be opening the Iwashita New Ginger Museum, and to commemorate this opening they’ll be selling the exclusive Iwashita New Ginger penlights pictured above!

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Artist reimagines alternate universe of Captain America: Civil Wok

In an alternate universe envisioned by Singaporean artist Tan Kwang Yang, it looks like the Avengers have ditched the whole “saving-the-world-act” and decided to pursue other lines of business.

Check out Tan’s neatly drawn little glimpse at such a world after the jump!

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New Japanese biking laws say no more earphones in ears…but what about other orifices?

A few days ago, we brought you a list of 14 things never to do on a bicycle in Japan in light of new cycling traffic laws that went into effect on June 1. Of course, the new, stricter laws are intended to promote bicycle safety and reduce accidents, but they mean a lot of cyclists in Japan are going to have to give up on some of their old bad habits, like riding while listening to music.

There’s a little speculation that riding with headphones in but no music on, and riding with just one earpiece in (although that sounds to us like a recipe for disaster when the other dangling earbud inevitably gets caught in your spokes) are probably not going to get you jail time or anything, but we like to play it safe here at RocketNews24, at least until happy hour rolls around.

So, when one of our Japanese writers – a noted music lover – was pondering other ways to get his music fix while commuting by bike, he stumbled on what seemed like an easy solution: If the law says you can’t ride with earbuds in your ears, well, just shove those suckers right up your schnoz. It’s so simple it just has to work!

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Professional Chinese food chef teaches us how to make the perfect fried rice

If you’re anything like us, you love Chinese food. Ramen, dumplings, spicy ribs, the always delicious chahan (fried rice) – you name it, we’ll keep eating it so long as you keep bringing it! Chahan is, we have to admit, pretty easy to make, but even so we can never get it to taste as good as the stuff they serve in the restaurant.

But no more! A couple of writers from our Japanese sister site recently went to get some pointers on cooking great fried rice from a real Chinese-food chef. Here are his four tips for making killer chahan at home!

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No more earphones while cycling in Japan? Well, how about nipplephones?

As you probably know, bicycles are an incredibly common method of transportation in Japan. They’ve also been a source of many accidents in the country, and police have taken an increasingly strict approach to dealing with law-breaking cyclists. New rules have recently been implemented to keep the country’s streets from turning into a crazy, Mad Max-esque bicycle dystopia, and one that’s really got people’s attention is a prohibition on earphones/headphones while cycling.

The exact rule and punishment seems to vary from location to location, but wearing earphones in both ears is sure to get you at least a warning, and in some places, Tokyo included, even just one ear is now against the law. But, one of our intrepid RocketNews24 Japan writers thought, what about earphones on your nipples?

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Going to an onsen hot spring is one of those quintessentially Japanese experiences that every visitor to the country should have. But is, sadly, an activity many westerners choose to skip for a number of reasons. Coming from a culture where taking a bath with another person is something you really don’t do beyond early childhood, the thought of walking around naked and sitting in a huge bath with a bunch of naked strangers can seem a bit unappealing. I myself was in Japan for two years before I finally decided to take the plunge, but once I did, I was hooked.

Our Japanese writers here at RocketNews24 decided to take a their American pal along for his first onsen experience at the famous Kusatsu Onsen. Find out what he thought of his first ever hot spring soak after the jump.

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Everyone’s got his own unique set of aesthetic sensibilities and ideal vision of beauty. In general, though, guys like looking at half-naked women, and when they aren’t in a position to look at one, they’ll settle for imagining them.

As such, it’s perfectly natural and healthy to fantasize about women wearing sexy lingerie if you’re a young man who’s reached the age of puberty (or if you’re an older man whose mind didn’t really progress that far afterwards). But when you start coming up with systems to determine what kind of lingerie a woman has on, like theorizing that it matches her umbrella, well, you might be thinking about women in their undies just a bit too much.

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While being an anime or manga artist takes a huge amount of artistic talent, they do at least have the advantage of complete control over the mediums in which they work. Making one person taller than another is just a matter of drawing longer lines. Want more people in a crowd scene? Just pencil them in. In a 2-D world, everything, even laws of physics like gravity, exists at, and can be bent to the whims of, the creator.

Cosplayers don’t have it so easy, though, and trying to recreate their favorite characters and scenes under real-world constraints can be a tricky task. These clever costumers have figured out some simple yet ingenious techniques for getting around those obstacles, though, and another behind-the-scenes peek at how they put their shots together reveals that sometimes an awesome final product only comes after some pretty silly-looking cosplay setup.

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