funny

Lexus car ceremony is eerily reminiscent of a…funeral??

This must be a summer for fake funerals. In July, Hatsune Miku found herself interred in Nico Nico Douga videos following a politician’s speculative remarks. And now a Lexus car is at the center of a new round of Internet amusement after some commenters noted that the company’s “car delivery ceremony” is oddly similar to a funeral.

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Road sign encourages safe driving while bringing laughter to the Internet masses

While governmental agencies aren’t exactly known for their sense of humor, accidental or otherwise, we occasionally get a nice surprise, like the road sign above. It reads, simply enough, “Feeling sleepy while driving / When will you take a break? / How about now!”

“Hunh? What’s so funny about that,” you ask.

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Hey, Starbucks laptop guy, whatcha doin’ over there?

Starbucks and virtually every other coffee shop worthy of faux hipster attention (the real hipsters having moved on to places that use siphons and play accordion music) have become synonymous with scenes of people using laptop computers in recent years, with rows of patrons sipping from paper cups while idly clicking, scrolling, pinching to zoom and staring lazily at their screens. Some even make temporary offices out of their few square feet of space, paying their rent in cups of joe and watched by hawk-eyed staff whose warm smiles drop a millimetre for every second a small cafe latte is nursed just that little bit too long.

For the rest of us, though, these table-hogging laptop luggers are a source of genuine intrigue. “What on earth could they be doing?” we wonder to ourselves, irked that they’ve taken all the good seats. “Are they actually working over there or are they just scrolling through photos on Facebook and tapping LOL into comment boxes?”

Japan’s My Navi News too was keen to know exactly what the folks who camp out at Starbucks are actually doing while the rest of us are engaging in conversations or staring awkwardly at the floor after making eye-contact one too many times with the cute barista, and put together a survey to find out. Let’s take a look at their findings.

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Stop the presses! Scoundrels enter Pokemon tournament with illegal monsters!

In what is undeniable proof that humanity is doomed, Nintendo recently announced that up to 1,500 people, some of them adults competing against children, entered the 2013 Global Showdown Pokemon tournament using illegally acquired Pokemon.

Apparently not content to wander the virtual landscape beating harmless critters into submission then trapping them in tiny, sphere-shaped cells, these deviants used a third-party program to magic high level Pokemon into their inventory without all the legwork and random luck usually required.

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China gives big boost to Pacific Rim in box office, amuses many with weird subtitles such as “Pegasus Meteor Fist”

While the Guillermo del Toro ode to tokusatsu (Godzilla, Ultraman, etc.) films had a reasonable opening in its home country, the box office take was rather low to cover its $190 million dollar budget. However, thanks to an astounding foreign release Pacific Rim can be considered a big success – the highest grossing foreign film of the year so far to be exact.

A large part of that success can be attributed to the might of the massive Chinese film going population. As of 18 August, the Chinese revenue was reported to be 618 million yuan (US$100M) surpassing even what Pacific Rim pulled in its home country. But there’s another reason why people are paying attention to the film’s Chinese release.

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Bubble Soccer is part soccer, part sumo, mostly Looney Tunes

Sports are getting way too serious these days. There are juicing scandals, fan fistfights and bench-clearing team-on-team brawls in just about every sport. It’s all just getting a little too heady, don’t you think?

Well, these Italians sure did. So, they took matters into their own hands, and created the hilarious new sport of Bubble Soccer, which finally combines the body contact of sumo wrestling, with the majesty of soccer and the zany antics of old Warner Bros cartoons, much to the amusement of Japan’s netizens.

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“That’s one large cafe latte to go. Would you like a boyfriend with that?” A Japanese coffee shop’s dating recipe

In Western countries, they say that “the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach.” Oddly enough, Japan uses the similar phrase: “Otoko gokoro wo tsukamu ni wa ibukuro kara,” or “you can snatch a man’s heart if you start with his stomach.” A local Twitter user managed to find a store in the Okubo area of Tokyo that might have taken this phrase a step too far, however.

Included on the store’s outside sign board, where normally you’d find today’s specials, was the coffee shop’s secret recipe for catching a man:

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Public restroom inspires creative thinking, results questionable

No one likes using public toilets, do they?

With the smell, the uncomfortable and unfamiliar surroundings, and the fear of butt-cooties latching onto our heinies, it’s only out of desperation that most people will drop their pants and park their naked butts onto a public toilet seat. So when one of the more fastidious members of society is faced with a dire situation, what do they do?

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Easy lunch – Man cooks a batch of eggs on his car dashboard in the summer heat

The traditional onsen tamago, not widely consumed outside of Japan, follows a simple recipe of blasting an egg in its shell with hot steam or letting it slow-cook in hot water. It’s basically a poached egg that’s shelled after the poaching.

Seeing as perfectly poaching an egg the traditional western way is a messy and surprisingly complicated affair, it makes a lot of sense to just leave the eggs in their shells and stick them in some hot water for a while, or better yet, just leave them in a hot car, forget about them entirely, and go play some XBox. Next time you go on a beer run, you’ll find delicious onsen tamago waiting for you on your dashboard, like this Japanese Twitter user.

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Thai commercial shows us the goods, leaves us laughing

From stuffing to pushup bras, women the world over have numerous techniques for increasing their bust. So, regardless of how you might feel about contemporary beauty standards, it’s impossible to deny the massive demand that “size-increasing” bras have. And you can bet that every undergarment-producing company in the world wants to be the one with the, uh, biggest reputation.

In an attempt to prove just how much their bras can boost your bust, the Thai branch of Wacoal released a risqué commercial that’s earned them quite a bit of international attention. And once you see it, you’ll understand why!

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Show solidarity with fellow runny egg lovers with “over easy” smartphone case

How one prefers their fried eggs cooked is about as divisive an issue as whether Batman or Wolverine would win in a fight. Many a surprise anniversary breakfast in bed has no doubt ended in bitter tears due to fried eggs being prepared in the incorrect way.

But you can avoid this unnecessary situation and show solidarity with fellow runny egg lovers with this new “egg in a basket” iPhone 5 case. Just snap your iPhone inside and share the other half with your runny egg soul mate; then, by clicking the two halves together as a secret greeting, you can baffle and enrage all those cretinous fully cooked yolk lovers at the diner.

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252 of Japan’s favorite animated gifs

Hey, you got a minute to spare? Actually make that a couple dozen minutes.  We’d like to share a few hundred of the wildest and funniest gifs getting circulated around the net in Japan.

Of course cats are well represented here but we also got dogs, spiders, manatees, lions, (no tigers), bears, monkeys, turtles, and people all injuring themselves and each other. Watch and marvel at feats of strength of these animals and people, and enjoy even more the cringe-worthy carnage that ensues when they don’t quite make it. Get an eyeful of a guy getting bitten in the nuts by a rottweiler. Enjoy military misfires, cats in zero gravity and the magic of Coach Raphael Benitez. Both faked and real hypnotically looped images are here for your amusement.

Without further ado, sit back, grab a snack, and enjoy these 252 animated gifs. Happy Friday, everyone!

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Is your pet cat too lazy and uninspiring? Turn him into Totoro!

Cats, eh? Lying around in the sun all day, ignoring their owners until their greedy little bellies are empty or they have an itch that they can’t scratch on their own. Anyone would think they weren’t put on this earth to constantly entertain us!

But if your pet cat simply isn’t in the mood to play and is the kind that will let you place random objects on its back without clawing your face off or vowing to smother you in your sleep, this little trick to transform an inactive furry pal in everyone’s favourite Studio Ghibli fluffball Totoro might be just the way to liven them up!

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Japanese man promises to marry if he can get 10,000 retweets

It’s that milestone of life that every young man waits for. When the moment comes he takes a breath, bows his head and asks for something that will change his life for ever.

We’re talking, of course, about getting 10,000 retweets on Twitter. This amazing dream came true for another lucky man in Japan recently. He also happened to get engaged too – which we think is super.

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Japan reacts to Western newscaster’s accidental doodle of  a penis on live TV

Live on air, even with the best scripting and a highly skilled team behind you, anything can happen. Minor mishaps during live broadcasts rarely cause too much trouble, and most viewers are generally quite understanding when they do, but there are some combinations–such as, oh, a serious news bulletin and a doodle of a giant schlong– that tend to raise a few eyebrows.

As many of you may have seen, footage appeared online last week showing newscaster Siobhan Riley using a touchscreen to draw on a map of the local area during a live news bulletin, accidentally creating what some people think looks like a giant penis in the process. Unfortunately for Ms. Riley the news even made it out to Japan where netizens positively lapped it up.

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Cats gone wild: The best cat gifs as selected by Japan

While usage statistics may vary around the world and we may not all be using quite the same services, certain parts of Internet culture cross national and cultural boundaries.

Porn, cosplay pictures, and gifs of cats doing stupid things are so essential to the Internet experience that if aliens arrived today and asked me to explain the World Wide Web, I’d tell them that it’s a series of tubes invented to  convey those three things from house to house. And once you got them sitting in front of a computer, they’d probably agree!

Today we have just over 40 “incredibly stupid (but cute!) cats” as selected by Japanese netizens.

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Green men pitching trouser tents and hat-wearing horses: the mascots of Japan

Japan’s mascot obsession is known by those even marginally familiar with the country’s culture. Characters like Hello Kitty and her signature silhouette are recognized in countries across the globe, and thanks to the wonders of the internet we’re able to learn more about other cultures than ever before. But something I find that many people don’t realize about Japan is the sheer breadth of things that get their own mascots. Take, for instance, Japanese prefectures.

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National Highway 339: The only staircase highway in Japan

In Japan, there are roughly 450 national highways wandering their way through the country, connecting the various cities and prefectures.

Their sizes and conditions obviously vary widely depending on location and usage, but for the most-part they all share one thing in common: cars can drive on them. But on 338.2 meters (about 425 yards) of National Highway 339 in Aomori Prefecture, not a single car, truck, scooter, or motorcycle is allowed.

Why? Because it’s actually a staircase!

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