funny

The Very Best of Japanese Love Hotels 【Photos】

In a country where a lot of people live at home until they get married, it can be hard for couples to get a little private time. Luckily, Japan has solved this lovers’ dilemma with the love hotel, a place where you can get a room for a couple of hours of sexy times. And not just any room! Love hotels are famous for their crazy themed rooms and over-the-top decor.

Some brilliant person at the Vipper Housoku message board here in Japan started a thread asking people to post pictures from love hotels, and we’ve collected the best of them for you here! Don’t worry, they are all totally safe for work, just utterly mind-boggling. Read More

We Visit the 2013 Kanamara Festival and Bring You a Slideshow as Long as… You Know

On the first Sunday of April in Kawasaki City, Kanagawa Prefecture, the Kanayama Shrine holds a festival known casually as the “Penis Festival” on account of its huge array of multi-colored members.

Known as one of Japan’s oddest festivals, the Kanamara Festival draws huge throbbing crowds from around the world. We sent a reporter to this year’s festival for a glans-on experience. The following is her report, along with more photos and videos than you could shake a wang at.

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Forget Google: Head-Scratching Questions from Japanese Job Interviews

April marks the beginning of a new fiscal year in Japan, bringing with it the season for job hunting. Of course, that means interviews. NicoNico News wondered what interview questions might be lying in wait for the unsuspecting, so they sent out a questionnaire to 1000 businesspeople to hear what questions had stumped them in the past. Here are some of the best, from the truly bizarre to the especially thought-provoking. Read More

Maid Cafes in Russia are Sad, Sad Places

The below video, which we stumbled through with ears open for loan words like “kawaii” and “product placement,” presumably depicts that most otaku of Japanese exports – a maid café – in the middle of Russia.

The interior’s got style in spades, albeit with weirdly out of place old timey photos and a suspicious lack of vodka bottles (apologies to Russian readers for the ignorant stereotyping).

As far as the food selection goes, the menu’s got Japanese maid café classics such as omu rice, but apparently also some more exotic selections like some kind of taco-burrito hybrid, which the Russian reporter happily digs into.

Most glaringly, the legendary service quality of Japanese maid cafes seems to have gotten lost in translation, as the seemingly only maid on duty lacks any enthusiasm for the job, lazily reciting her lines like she’s been popping valium just to get her through one more bleak day of squirting ketchup squiggles on pimply-faced patrons’ omelets.

Source: Yahoo! Japan

Investigating an Old Schoolyard Myth: Is a Single Ejaculation Really Equal to Sprinting 100 Metres?

There’s a myth that many young men in Japan are familiar with: the physical exertion involved in one ejaculation is the same as running 100 metres as fast as you can. Now, although many such claims often carry about as much scientific weight as the idea that dropping a cold key down someone’s back can cure the hiccups, as any men will tell you, there’s a reason why we often feel the need to collapse and fall asleep after a particularly vigorous session.

Nonsense or not, this particular myth is one that has existed for generations in Japan and refuses to die off, being passed from one huddle of teenage boys or young office workers to the next. For this reason, online magazine R25 turned to a medical professional to get the cold, hard facts.

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Japanese Netizens Mistake Mobile Giant SoftBank’s Proud Announcement for April Fools’ Joke

You know your company has a bad reputation when the general public interprets an official announcement as something so improbable that it could only be an April Fools’ gag.

Japanese mobile provider SoftBank — perhaps most famous for its commercials featuring a talking shiba inu and his human family — announced via its website earlier today that it now officially has the best network coverage in Japan, enabling its users to connect with greater ease than any other mobile phone provider. Alas, the statement was immediately laughed off as a joke by many Japanese Internet users, with cries of “Oh, SoftBank, you guys have a great sense of humour!”

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Presenting: RocketNews24’s First Ever Commercial

That’s right, kids, we’ve hit the big leagues. And it’s all thanks to you. Sure, we began in a tiny one-room office in Shinjuku, bickering with each other about elbow space, missing pencils and who had been using the communal coffee without putting a five yen coin in the jar beside it, but thanks to our wonderful readers and the attention of the Internet masses in general, we’re now a fully fledged news beast stationed in a swanky high-rise where we rub shoulders with some of Japan’s greatest innovators and creative geniuses.

To mark the occasion, we’ve just put the finishing touches to our new commercial, featuring none other than reporter extraordinaire Mr. Sato, and a tremendously catchy jingle. The full video — plus a special bonus version — after the jump!

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There’s a new sheriff in town, and his name is Hentai Kamen.

Just two weeks prior to the release of his own movie, the “perverted mask” renegade that is Hentai Kamen has been sighted in a special ad intended to crack down on inconsiderate cinema patrons who use their mobile phones, put their feet up on the seats in front of them or sneakily record the movie with video cameras.

Of course, this being Hentai Kamen, justice comes in usual forms as we see three unsavoury moviegoers get their just deserts, pervert style.

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Say that Again? Japan’s Most Contradictory Signs

There’s a great word in Japanese that’s stuck with me ever since I first came across it: mujun. The meaning of the word is simply “contradiction” or “inconsistency”, but it’s the way that it’s written that’s truly magical. Almost as great as the kanji for convex and concave (凸凹), the Japanese word for contradictory is written by putting the kanji character for spear (矛) next to the one for shield (盾). What do you get when you put a spear and a shield together? No, not a well armed Roman, but equal attack and defence- something that, ultimately, goes nowhere. Mujun 矛盾.

It’s not often that the Japanese let logic get the better of them, but as the following gallery of images which is currently doing the rounds on Japanese message boards shows, when they get it wrong Japan really pushes the boat out.

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Made in China: A Gallery of Awesome Imitation Goods 【Photos】

Despite the country’s phenomenal growth in recent years, the words “Made in China” carry certain negative connotations for some. Ignoring the fact that a vast proportion of our electrical goods–iPhones included–are assembled there, many people are quick to point to the label on their goods whenever a problem occurs.

Rather than focus on the negative, though, we’d like to take a few moments to commend China’s creativity and ingenuity when it comes to copyright restriction and trademarked brands. From Penesamig batteries to Calvim Klaim underwear, China is without a doubt the king of clever imitation.

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Tokyo Metro Manner Posters Confuse and Delight Foreign Passengers 【Photo Gallery】

Sometimes the hustle and bustle of big city life in Tokyo makes you forget your manners. Women who don’t have enough time in the morning apply makeup on bumpy train rides, people doze off on the shoulder of their neighboring passenger, and the occasional man will clip his finger nails. With most people commuting by train and working very long hours, sometimes there’s no time to do things at home. And sometimes, you’re just so tired and stressed that you don’t care that you are behaving badly.

As a result, back in 2008, the Tokyo Metro system launched a three-year-long campaign aimed at reminding subway passengers to mind their manners while riding the trains. It featured the slogan “Please do it at home” or “Please do it again” alongside an illustration of the featured manner or rule. All posters are written in Japanese and English, some featuring hilariously outrageous and sometimes confusing activities that make you wonder, “Do people actually do that on a train?!”. For your viewing pleasure, may we present to you a compilation of these entertaining posters.

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Crazy Ninja Skills: Japan’s Schoolgirls Are Too Epic For Words 【Photos】

It’s all too easy to sneer whenever someone in the media brings up “the youth of today” and how they’re always wasting time with their gadgets, music and wallpaper paste or whatever it is they do instead of studying to become the people who will one day run the country and help us on and off the toilet.

But when we stumble upon photos of such epic proportions as these, we can’t help but forgive Japan’s youth for tooling around every now and then, and find ourselves smiling as we look on and think: man, that’s cool.

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Japan’s Greatest Faux Beers: Everything You Need to Know About Happoshu

Whether you realize it or not, you’ve probably had a happoshu (発泡酒)or “low-malt beer-like beverage” if you’ve ever had a night out in Japan.

The taste of a typical happoshu can vary from “pretty close to the real thing” to “yes, this is definitely weasel urine.” Going into a convenience store and blindly grabbing a beer can is thus a bit of a gamble in Japan, so, ever the masculine, barrel-chested and dashingly handsome role model father to our readers, we’ve done the work for you and chosen the five happoshu brands that are worth your time:

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Newest Pickup Artist Technique: Dress Like a Woman, Wander Around Shinjuku

An especially unusual schoolgirl is getting quite the reputation on Twitter due to the fact that she is either a) suffering from hypertrichosis or, b) is actually a very old man (who is young at heart).

The sailor uniformed old man is primarily seen in the Ikebukuro and Shinjuku areas of Tokyo and seems to have carved a niche posing with schoolgirls, who are seriously eating it up. This may be the freshest new way for guys out of their prime to make some new lady friends.

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Evil Science: Splicing Actor Nicholas Cage with Pokémon Produces Terrifying Results

Some people love Pokémon. Some people love movies. And some people love actor and director Nicholas Cage. Quite why one creative individual decided that the Face/Off and Kick-Ass star would look good as a pocket monster, though, we have no idea. One thing’s for certain, though: Cagémon is at once wonderful and terrifying.

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Twitter Explodes as Polar Bear is Spotted Fishing in the Wilds of Tokyo

OK, so it may not be a living, breathing polar bear (only joking, kids- of course it’s real!), but this certainly isn’t something that you’d expect to see on your way to work in the big city!

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Taiwanese Woman Stifles Snicker, Divorces Man After Discovering Underwhelming Endowment

A Taiwanese couple, a 55-year old man and 52-year old woman, have divorced after four years living in separate apartments following the woman’s wedding night discovery that her new husband’s member appeared to have a severe case of dwarfism.

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Psst, Your Stamen Is Showing: Little Naked Flower Men

Nature is not shy. She loves to let it all hang out, and there might be no better example of this in the botanical world than Orchis simia, otherwise known as the Monkey Orchid, whose petals look like little naked men, complete with big ol’ schlongs. Read More

Overhead Tablet Stand Makes it Easy to Use Your iPad While Lounging in Bed

Last month we introduced a clever invention that held a heavy laptop over the user’s head, allowing anyone to use their computer while lounging in bed. This month we found a different version of the same concept: an overhead tablet stand. As long as they are sturdy enough to support the weight of their intended device, the laptop and tablet stands seem like useful products. But if the stands did fail and if you had to choose, we’re guessing you’d rather get a tablet to the face than a laptop.  Read More

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